The Departed
Frank Costello: Have a seat, Bill.
[Costigan sits down at Costello's dinner table]
Frank Costello: [while eating crab] Do you know John Lennon?
Billy Costigan: Yeah, sure, he was the president before Lincoln.
Frank Costello: Lennon said, "I'm an artist. You give me a fucking tuba, I'll get you something out of it."
Billy Costigan: [sarcastically] Well I tell you Mr. Costello, I'd like to squeeze some fucking money out of it.
Wasn't Lennon the president after Lincoln?
Billy Costigan: [talking in the back seat of a car] When are you gonna take Costello, huh?
[animated]
Billy Costigan: I mean, what's wrong with taking him on any one of the
[yelling]
Billy Costigan: million fucking felonies that you've seen him do, or I've seen him do? I mean, I mean, he murdered somebody, right? The guy fucking murders somebody, and you don't fucking take him! What are you waiting for, honestly? I mean, do you want him to chop me up and feed me to the poor? Is that what you guys want?
Dignam: [sarcastically while sitting in the front seat] Yeah, well that might stick.
Oliver Queenan: [to Dignam] Will you shut up?
[to Billy]
Oliver Queenan: We are building a case. It takes time. You know that.
Billy Costigan: Somethings wrong. I'm telling you, something's wrong.
Oliver Queenan: Yeah, maybe.
Let's run it by the FBI.
Billy Costigan: [during Costigan's interview] Do you lie?
Madolyn: Why? Do you?
Billy Costigan: No, I'm asking if you lie.
Madolyn: Honesty is not synonymous with truth.
Billy Costigan: [amused] Yeah, you lie. You lie.
Like saying, "abortion is immoral". Is that a lie?
Frank Costello: When you decide to be something, you can be it. That's what they don't tell you in the church. When I was your age they would say we can become cops, or criminals. Today, what I'm saying to you is this: when you're facing a loaded gun, what's the difference?
As often as not?
Billy Costigan: [to Madolyn] Let me tell you something. They signed up to use their weapons. Most of them, all right. But they watch enough TV, so they know they have to weep after they use their weapons. There is no one more full of shit than a cop. Except for a cop on TV.
Law and Order!
Frank Costello: Church wants you in your place. Kneel, stand, kneel, stand. If you go for that sort of thing, I don't know what to do for you. A man makes his own way. No one gives it to you. You have to take it. "Non serviam."
Young Colin: James Joyce.
Frank Costello: Smart, Colin. Guineas from the north and down Providence try to tell me what to do. And, uh, something maybe happen to them.
Amen?
Quote of the day
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iambiguous
- Posts: 7750
- Joined: Mon Nov 22, 2010 10:23 pm
Re: Quote of the day
Slavoj Žižek
Here is an old phrase I like: “The only way to the universal good is that we all become strangers to ourselves.” You imagine looking at yourself with a foreign gaze, through foreign eyes. I think this is something that could be the greatest thing in humanity. You are never really limited just to your own perspective. I don’t like the false identity politics of multiculturalism which says that “you are enclosed in your culture.” No, we have all this amazing capacity to be surprised, not by others, but by ourselves seeing how what we are doing is strange.
See, didn't I tell you?
Therein resides the fundamental systemic violence of capitalism, much more uncanny than direct pre-capitalist socio-ideological violence: its violence is no longer attributable to concrete individuals with their 'evil' intentions, but is purely 'objective,' systemic, anonymous--quite literally a conceptual violence, the violence of a Concept whose self-deployment rules and regulates social realty.
Uh, whatever that means?
...in contrast to modern art, which causes displeasure-modern art, by definition, hurts. In this precise sense, modern art is sublime: it causes pleasure-in-pain, it produces its effect through its own failure, insofar as it refers to the impossible Things.”
To really change things, one should accept that nothing can really be changed within the existing system.
Uh, whatever that means?
To really change things, one should accept that nothing can really be changed within the existing system.
Right, like that all changes with the new system.
On 11 September 2001 the Twin Towers were hit. Twelve years earlier, on 9 November 1989, the Berlin Wall fell. That date heralded the “happy 90’s,” the Francis Fukuyama dream of the “end of history” –the belief that liberal democracy had, in principle, won; that the search was over; that the advent of a global, liberal world community lurked just around the corner; that the obstacles to this ultra-Hollywood happy ending were merely empirical and contingent (local pockets of resistance were the leaders did not yet grasp that their time was up). In contrast, 9/11 is the main symbol of the Clintonite happy 90’s. This is the era in which new walls emerge everywhere, between Israel and the West Bank, around the European union, on the U.S.-Mexico border. The rise of the populist New Right is just the most prominent example of the urge to raise new walls.
Any "New Right populists" here? You're up!
Why are so many problems today perceived as problems of intolerance, rather than as problems of inequality, exploitation, or injustice? Why is the proposed remedy tolerance, rather than emancipation, political struggle, or even armed struggle?
No, seriously?
Here is an old phrase I like: “The only way to the universal good is that we all become strangers to ourselves.” You imagine looking at yourself with a foreign gaze, through foreign eyes. I think this is something that could be the greatest thing in humanity. You are never really limited just to your own perspective. I don’t like the false identity politics of multiculturalism which says that “you are enclosed in your culture.” No, we have all this amazing capacity to be surprised, not by others, but by ourselves seeing how what we are doing is strange.
See, didn't I tell you?
Therein resides the fundamental systemic violence of capitalism, much more uncanny than direct pre-capitalist socio-ideological violence: its violence is no longer attributable to concrete individuals with their 'evil' intentions, but is purely 'objective,' systemic, anonymous--quite literally a conceptual violence, the violence of a Concept whose self-deployment rules and regulates social realty.
Uh, whatever that means?
...in contrast to modern art, which causes displeasure-modern art, by definition, hurts. In this precise sense, modern art is sublime: it causes pleasure-in-pain, it produces its effect through its own failure, insofar as it refers to the impossible Things.”
To really change things, one should accept that nothing can really be changed within the existing system.
Uh, whatever that means?
To really change things, one should accept that nothing can really be changed within the existing system.
Right, like that all changes with the new system.
On 11 September 2001 the Twin Towers were hit. Twelve years earlier, on 9 November 1989, the Berlin Wall fell. That date heralded the “happy 90’s,” the Francis Fukuyama dream of the “end of history” –the belief that liberal democracy had, in principle, won; that the search was over; that the advent of a global, liberal world community lurked just around the corner; that the obstacles to this ultra-Hollywood happy ending were merely empirical and contingent (local pockets of resistance were the leaders did not yet grasp that their time was up). In contrast, 9/11 is the main symbol of the Clintonite happy 90’s. This is the era in which new walls emerge everywhere, between Israel and the West Bank, around the European union, on the U.S.-Mexico border. The rise of the populist New Right is just the most prominent example of the urge to raise new walls.
Any "New Right populists" here? You're up!
Why are so many problems today perceived as problems of intolerance, rather than as problems of inequality, exploitation, or injustice? Why is the proposed remedy tolerance, rather than emancipation, political struggle, or even armed struggle?
No, seriously?
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iambiguous
- Posts: 7750
- Joined: Mon Nov 22, 2010 10:23 pm
Re: Quote of the day
Un Coeur en Hiver
Stephane [at Helene’s bookstore]: It’s odd that in three-quarters of these books, when thay talk about love, whether it’s an airport novel, a masterpiece or a cook book it’s the same vocabulary. Overflowing.
Helene: And you find that obscene?
Stephane: No. As written it is often beautiful.
Well, unless of course it's trite.
Daniel: What upsets me, as I wrote in my last book, is that on the pretext that it’s all culture some rate a pop video alongside a Claudel play, a Piero Della Francesca or the Ravel sonata our friend is playing. The confusion is unprecedented. It’s all lumped together, pell-mell.
Regine: People can still choose.
Daniel: Yes, but with everything meriting equal attention concensus of opinion becomes a wooly horror. I believe in a certain mental vigilance. Is that pompous?
Lachaume: No. We’re listening. It’s the voice of tradition.
Daniel: Tradition! So I’m a reactionary.
Lachaume: No, you speak for an anxious elite in a world threatened by democratic excess.
Daniel: I’ve fought elitism all my life.
Camille: There’s confusion, I agree. If culture is still a privilege it isn’t reserved for quite so few.
Daniel: It’s worse, all these clueless clodhoppers in the museums.
Camille: Yes, but if in this museum a clodhopper’s life is changed by a work of art, isn’t that something?
Stephane [to Camille]: You almost agree. For you, too, there’s the sensitive individual in the blind masses.
Camille: I didn’t say that.
Maxime: No, you said there’s a natural selection of people destined…
Camille: No not at all.
Maxime: You said some see things that others don’t.
Stephane: Yes. That’s what you said.
Camille: Yes. I mean, no. But…I exclude no one.
So, who should we exclude -- ban -- here?
Lachaume: And you? You have no opinion?
Stephane: No.
Camille: None?
Lachaume: He’s above the debate.
Stephane: I hear contradictory arguments, all valid.
Bingo! But...
Camille: We all cancel each other out, we can’t talk about anything anymore?
Stephane: A tempting prospect, I guess. I don’t have your goodwill.
Lachaume: We respect your silence.
Camille: In speaking, one risks sounding stupid. Not speaking you may appear intelligent.
Too close to call?
Helene: You establish a real intimacy.
Stephane: It was she who came to me.
Helene: But it’s what you were waiting for.
Stephane: Let’s say, what I hoped for.
Helene: Are you in love with her?
Stephane: In love?
Helene: I know you bristle at the word.
Stephane: No, it disorients me. Let me think. No, I don’t think I am. No.
Helene: Anyway, it’s Maxime she loves.
Stephane: Yes. At one point though I did get the impression she would rather be having dinner with me than with him.
It's not for nothing that Stephane comes closest to being how I think of myself. Well, up on the silver screen anyway.
Camille: He said he was coming, but he didn’t. He seemed put out when I called.
Regine: But you told him to stay away.
Camille: I’m not talking about Maxime. I’m talking about Stephane. I don’t understand. When he’s there, he’s there. Then suddenly it’s as if I didn’t exist.
She never really figures it out. No even after Stephane explains it to her.
Stephane [at Helene’s bookstore]: It’s odd that in three-quarters of these books, when thay talk about love, whether it’s an airport novel, a masterpiece or a cook book it’s the same vocabulary. Overflowing.
Helene: And you find that obscene?
Stephane: No. As written it is often beautiful.
Well, unless of course it's trite.
Daniel: What upsets me, as I wrote in my last book, is that on the pretext that it’s all culture some rate a pop video alongside a Claudel play, a Piero Della Francesca or the Ravel sonata our friend is playing. The confusion is unprecedented. It’s all lumped together, pell-mell.
Regine: People can still choose.
Daniel: Yes, but with everything meriting equal attention concensus of opinion becomes a wooly horror. I believe in a certain mental vigilance. Is that pompous?
Lachaume: No. We’re listening. It’s the voice of tradition.
Daniel: Tradition! So I’m a reactionary.
Lachaume: No, you speak for an anxious elite in a world threatened by democratic excess.
Daniel: I’ve fought elitism all my life.
Camille: There’s confusion, I agree. If culture is still a privilege it isn’t reserved for quite so few.
Daniel: It’s worse, all these clueless clodhoppers in the museums.
Camille: Yes, but if in this museum a clodhopper’s life is changed by a work of art, isn’t that something?
Stephane [to Camille]: You almost agree. For you, too, there’s the sensitive individual in the blind masses.
Camille: I didn’t say that.
Maxime: No, you said there’s a natural selection of people destined…
Camille: No not at all.
Maxime: You said some see things that others don’t.
Stephane: Yes. That’s what you said.
Camille: Yes. I mean, no. But…I exclude no one.
So, who should we exclude -- ban -- here?
Lachaume: And you? You have no opinion?
Stephane: No.
Camille: None?
Lachaume: He’s above the debate.
Stephane: I hear contradictory arguments, all valid.
Bingo! But...
Camille: We all cancel each other out, we can’t talk about anything anymore?
Stephane: A tempting prospect, I guess. I don’t have your goodwill.
Lachaume: We respect your silence.
Camille: In speaking, one risks sounding stupid. Not speaking you may appear intelligent.
Too close to call?
Helene: You establish a real intimacy.
Stephane: It was she who came to me.
Helene: But it’s what you were waiting for.
Stephane: Let’s say, what I hoped for.
Helene: Are you in love with her?
Stephane: In love?
Helene: I know you bristle at the word.
Stephane: No, it disorients me. Let me think. No, I don’t think I am. No.
Helene: Anyway, it’s Maxime she loves.
Stephane: Yes. At one point though I did get the impression she would rather be having dinner with me than with him.
It's not for nothing that Stephane comes closest to being how I think of myself. Well, up on the silver screen anyway.
Camille: He said he was coming, but he didn’t. He seemed put out when I called.
Regine: But you told him to stay away.
Camille: I’m not talking about Maxime. I’m talking about Stephane. I don’t understand. When he’s there, he’s there. Then suddenly it’s as if I didn’t exist.
She never really figures it out. No even after Stephane explains it to her.
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Impenitent
- Posts: 4387
- Joined: Wed Feb 10, 2010 2:04 pm
Re: Quote of the day
inspired by Costello (another oldie but goodie)
Abbott: Well Costello, I'm going to New York with you. You know Bucky Harris, the Yankee's manager, gave me a job as coach for as long as you're on the team.
Costello: Look Abbott, if you're the coach, you must know all the players.
Abbott: I certainly do.
Costello: Well you know I've never met the guys. So you'll have to tell me their names, and then I'll know who's playing on the team.
Abbott: Oh, I'll tell you their names, but you know it seems to me they give these ball players now-a-days very peculiar names.
Costello: You mean funny names?
Abbott: Strange names, pet names...like Dizzy Dean...
Costello: His brother Daffy.
Abbott: Daffy Dean...
Costello: And their French cousin.
Abbott: French?
Costello: Goofé.
Abbott: Goofé Dean. Well, let's see, we have on the bags, Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know is on third...
Costello: That's what I want to find out.
Abbott: I say Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know's on third.
Costello: Are you the manager?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: You gonna be the coach too?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: And you don't know the fellows' names?
Abbott: Well I should.
Costello: Well then who's on first?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: I mean the fellow's name.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The guy on first.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The first baseman.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The guy playing...
Abbott: Who is on first!
Costello: I'm asking YOU who's on first.
Abbott: That's the man's name.
Costello: That's who's name?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: Well go ahead and tell me.
Abbott: That's it.
Costello: That's who?
Abbott: Yes.
PAUSE
Costello: Look, you gotta first baseman?
Abbott: Certainly.
Costello: Who's playing first?
Abbott: That's right.
Costello: When you pay off the first baseman every month, who gets the money?
Abbott: Every dollar of it.
Costello: All I'm trying to find out is the fellow's name on first base.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The guy that gets...
Abbott: That's it.
Costello: Who gets the money...
Abbott: He does, every dollar. Sometimes his wife comes down and collects it.
Costello: Who's wife?
Abbott: Yes.
PAUSE
Abbott: What's wrong with that?
Costello: Look, all I wanna know is when you sign up the first baseman, how does he sign his name?
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The guy.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: How does he sign...
Abbott: That's how he signs it.
Costello: Who?
Abbott: Yes.
PAUSE
Costello: All I'm trying to find out is what's the guy's name on first base.
Abbott: No. What is on second base.
Costello: I'm not asking you who's on second.
Abbott: Who's on first.
Costello: One base at a time!
Abbott: Well, don't change the players around.
Costello: I'm not changing nobody!
Abbott: Take it easy, buddy.
Costello: I'm only asking you, who's the guy on first base?
Abbott: That's right.
Costello: Ok.
Abbott: All right.
PAUSE
Costello: What's the guy's name on first base?
Abbott: No. What is on second.
Costello: I'm not asking you who's on second.
Abbott: Who's on first.
Costello: I don't know.
Abbott: He's on third, we're not talking about him.
Costello: Now how did I get on third base?
Abbott: Why you mentioned his name.
Costello: If I mentioned the third baseman's name, who did I say is playing third?
Abbott: No. Who's playing first.
Costello: What's on first?
Abbott: What's on second.
Costello: I don't know.
Abbott: He's on third.
Costello: There I go, back on third again!
PAUSE
Costello: Would you just stay on third base and don't go off it.
Abbott: All right, what do you want to know?
Costello: Now who's playing third base?
Abbott: Why do you insist on putting Who on third base?
Costello: What am I putting on third.
Abbott: No. What is on second.
Costello: You don't want who on second?
Abbott: Who is on first.
Costello: I don't know.
Abbott & Costello Together:Third base!
PAUSE
Costello: Look, you gotta outfield?
Abbott: Sure.
Costello: The left fielder's name?
Abbott: Why.
Costello: I just thought I'd ask you.
Abbott: Well, I just thought I'd tell ya.
Costello: Then tell me who's playing left field.
Abbott: Who's playing first.
Costello: I'm not... stay out of the infield! I want to know what's the guy's name in left field?
Abbott: No, What is on second.
Costello: I'm not asking you who's on second.
Abbott: Who's on first!
Costello: I don't know.
Abbott & Costello Together: Third base!
PAUSE
Costello: The left fielder's name?
Abbott: Why.
Costello: Because!
Abbott: Oh, he's centerfield.
PAUSE
Costello: Look, You gotta pitcher on this team?
Abbott: Sure.
Costello: The pitcher's name?
Abbott: Tomorrow.
Costello: You don't want to tell me today?
Abbott: I'm telling you now.
Costello: Then go ahead.
Abbott: Tomorrow!
Costello: What time?
Abbott: What time what?
Costello: What time tomorrow are you gonna tell me who's pitching?
Abbott: Now listen. Who is not pitching.
Costello: I'll break your arm, you say who's on first! I want to know what's the pitcher's name?
Abbott: What's on second.
Costello: I don't know.
Abbott & Costello Together: Third base!
PAUSE
Costello: Gotta a catcher?
Abbott: Certainly.
Costello: The catcher's name?
Abbott: Today.
Costello: Today, and tomorrow's pitching.
Abbott: Now you've got it.
Costello: All we got is a couple of days on the team.
PAUSE
Costello: You know I'm a catcher too.
Abbott: So they tell me.
Costello: I get behind the plate to do some fancy catching, Tomorrow's pitching on my team and a heavy hitter gets up. Now the heavy hitter bunts the ball. When he bunts the ball, me, being a good catcher, I'm gonna throw the guy out at first base. So I pick up the ball and throw it to who?
Abbott: Now that's the first thing you've said right.
Costello: I don't even know what I'm talking about!
PAUSE
Abbott: That's all you have to do.
Costello: Is to throw the ball to first base.
Abbott: Yes!
Costello: Now who's got it?
Abbott: Naturally.
PAUSE
Costello: Look, if I throw the ball to first base, somebody's gotta get it. Now who has it?
Abbott: Naturally.
Costello: Who?
Abbott: Naturally.
Costello: Naturally?
Abbott: Naturally.
Costello: So I pick up the ball and I throw it to Naturally.
Abbott: No you don't, you throw the ball to Who.
Costello: Naturally.
Abbott: That's different.
Costello: That's what I said.
Abbott: You're not saying it...
Costello: I throw the ball to Naturally.
Abbott: You throw it to Who.
Costello: Naturally.
Abbott: That's it.
Costello: That's what I said!
Abbott: You ask me.
Costello: I throw the ball to who?
Abbott: Naturally.
Costello: Now you ask me.
Abbott: You throw the ball to Who?
Costello: Naturally.
Abbott: That's it.
Costello: Same as you! Same as YOU! I throw the ball to who. Whoever it is drops the ball and the guy runs to second. Who picks up the ball and throws it to What. What throws it to I Don't Know. I Don't Know throws it back to Tomorrow, Triple play. Another guy gets up and hits a long fly ball to Because. Why? I don't know! He's on third and I don't give a darn!
Abbott: What?
Costello: I said I don't give a darn!
Abbott: Oh, that's our shortstop.
-Imp
Abbott: Well Costello, I'm going to New York with you. You know Bucky Harris, the Yankee's manager, gave me a job as coach for as long as you're on the team.
Costello: Look Abbott, if you're the coach, you must know all the players.
Abbott: I certainly do.
Costello: Well you know I've never met the guys. So you'll have to tell me their names, and then I'll know who's playing on the team.
Abbott: Oh, I'll tell you their names, but you know it seems to me they give these ball players now-a-days very peculiar names.
Costello: You mean funny names?
Abbott: Strange names, pet names...like Dizzy Dean...
Costello: His brother Daffy.
Abbott: Daffy Dean...
Costello: And their French cousin.
Abbott: French?
Costello: Goofé.
Abbott: Goofé Dean. Well, let's see, we have on the bags, Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know is on third...
Costello: That's what I want to find out.
Abbott: I say Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know's on third.
Costello: Are you the manager?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: You gonna be the coach too?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: And you don't know the fellows' names?
Abbott: Well I should.
Costello: Well then who's on first?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: I mean the fellow's name.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The guy on first.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The first baseman.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The guy playing...
Abbott: Who is on first!
Costello: I'm asking YOU who's on first.
Abbott: That's the man's name.
Costello: That's who's name?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: Well go ahead and tell me.
Abbott: That's it.
Costello: That's who?
Abbott: Yes.
PAUSE
Costello: Look, you gotta first baseman?
Abbott: Certainly.
Costello: Who's playing first?
Abbott: That's right.
Costello: When you pay off the first baseman every month, who gets the money?
Abbott: Every dollar of it.
Costello: All I'm trying to find out is the fellow's name on first base.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The guy that gets...
Abbott: That's it.
Costello: Who gets the money...
Abbott: He does, every dollar. Sometimes his wife comes down and collects it.
Costello: Who's wife?
Abbott: Yes.
PAUSE
Abbott: What's wrong with that?
Costello: Look, all I wanna know is when you sign up the first baseman, how does he sign his name?
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The guy.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: How does he sign...
Abbott: That's how he signs it.
Costello: Who?
Abbott: Yes.
PAUSE
Costello: All I'm trying to find out is what's the guy's name on first base.
Abbott: No. What is on second base.
Costello: I'm not asking you who's on second.
Abbott: Who's on first.
Costello: One base at a time!
Abbott: Well, don't change the players around.
Costello: I'm not changing nobody!
Abbott: Take it easy, buddy.
Costello: I'm only asking you, who's the guy on first base?
Abbott: That's right.
Costello: Ok.
Abbott: All right.
PAUSE
Costello: What's the guy's name on first base?
Abbott: No. What is on second.
Costello: I'm not asking you who's on second.
Abbott: Who's on first.
Costello: I don't know.
Abbott: He's on third, we're not talking about him.
Costello: Now how did I get on third base?
Abbott: Why you mentioned his name.
Costello: If I mentioned the third baseman's name, who did I say is playing third?
Abbott: No. Who's playing first.
Costello: What's on first?
Abbott: What's on second.
Costello: I don't know.
Abbott: He's on third.
Costello: There I go, back on third again!
PAUSE
Costello: Would you just stay on third base and don't go off it.
Abbott: All right, what do you want to know?
Costello: Now who's playing third base?
Abbott: Why do you insist on putting Who on third base?
Costello: What am I putting on third.
Abbott: No. What is on second.
Costello: You don't want who on second?
Abbott: Who is on first.
Costello: I don't know.
Abbott & Costello Together:Third base!
PAUSE
Costello: Look, you gotta outfield?
Abbott: Sure.
Costello: The left fielder's name?
Abbott: Why.
Costello: I just thought I'd ask you.
Abbott: Well, I just thought I'd tell ya.
Costello: Then tell me who's playing left field.
Abbott: Who's playing first.
Costello: I'm not... stay out of the infield! I want to know what's the guy's name in left field?
Abbott: No, What is on second.
Costello: I'm not asking you who's on second.
Abbott: Who's on first!
Costello: I don't know.
Abbott & Costello Together: Third base!
PAUSE
Costello: The left fielder's name?
Abbott: Why.
Costello: Because!
Abbott: Oh, he's centerfield.
PAUSE
Costello: Look, You gotta pitcher on this team?
Abbott: Sure.
Costello: The pitcher's name?
Abbott: Tomorrow.
Costello: You don't want to tell me today?
Abbott: I'm telling you now.
Costello: Then go ahead.
Abbott: Tomorrow!
Costello: What time?
Abbott: What time what?
Costello: What time tomorrow are you gonna tell me who's pitching?
Abbott: Now listen. Who is not pitching.
Costello: I'll break your arm, you say who's on first! I want to know what's the pitcher's name?
Abbott: What's on second.
Costello: I don't know.
Abbott & Costello Together: Third base!
PAUSE
Costello: Gotta a catcher?
Abbott: Certainly.
Costello: The catcher's name?
Abbott: Today.
Costello: Today, and tomorrow's pitching.
Abbott: Now you've got it.
Costello: All we got is a couple of days on the team.
PAUSE
Costello: You know I'm a catcher too.
Abbott: So they tell me.
Costello: I get behind the plate to do some fancy catching, Tomorrow's pitching on my team and a heavy hitter gets up. Now the heavy hitter bunts the ball. When he bunts the ball, me, being a good catcher, I'm gonna throw the guy out at first base. So I pick up the ball and throw it to who?
Abbott: Now that's the first thing you've said right.
Costello: I don't even know what I'm talking about!
PAUSE
Abbott: That's all you have to do.
Costello: Is to throw the ball to first base.
Abbott: Yes!
Costello: Now who's got it?
Abbott: Naturally.
PAUSE
Costello: Look, if I throw the ball to first base, somebody's gotta get it. Now who has it?
Abbott: Naturally.
Costello: Who?
Abbott: Naturally.
Costello: Naturally?
Abbott: Naturally.
Costello: So I pick up the ball and I throw it to Naturally.
Abbott: No you don't, you throw the ball to Who.
Costello: Naturally.
Abbott: That's different.
Costello: That's what I said.
Abbott: You're not saying it...
Costello: I throw the ball to Naturally.
Abbott: You throw it to Who.
Costello: Naturally.
Abbott: That's it.
Costello: That's what I said!
Abbott: You ask me.
Costello: I throw the ball to who?
Abbott: Naturally.
Costello: Now you ask me.
Abbott: You throw the ball to Who?
Costello: Naturally.
Abbott: That's it.
Costello: Same as you! Same as YOU! I throw the ball to who. Whoever it is drops the ball and the guy runs to second. Who picks up the ball and throws it to What. What throws it to I Don't Know. I Don't Know throws it back to Tomorrow, Triple play. Another guy gets up and hits a long fly ball to Because. Why? I don't know! He's on third and I don't give a darn!
Abbott: What?
Costello: I said I don't give a darn!
Abbott: Oh, that's our shortstop.
-Imp
-
iambiguous
- Posts: 7750
- Joined: Mon Nov 22, 2010 10:23 pm
Re: Quote of the day
Tell that to Raymond Babbitt.Impenitent wrote: ↑Tue Apr 02, 2024 11:31 pm inspired by Costello (another oldie but goodie)
Abbott: Well Costello, I'm going to New York with you. You know Bucky Harris, the Yankee's manager, gave me a job as coach for as long as you're on the team.
Costello: Look Abbott, if you're the coach, you must know all the players.
Abbott: I certainly do.
Costello: Well you know I've never met the guys. So you'll have to tell me their names, and then I'll know who's playing on the team.
Abbott: Oh, I'll tell you their names, but you know it seems to me they give these ball players now-a-days very peculiar names.
Costello: You mean funny names?
Abbott: Strange names, pet names...like Dizzy Dean...
Costello: His brother Daffy.
Abbott: Daffy Dean...
Costello: And their French cousin.
Abbott: French?
Costello: Goofé.
Abbott: Goofé Dean. Well, let's see, we have on the bags, Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know is on third...
Costello: That's what I want to find out.
Abbott: I say Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know's on third.
Costello: Are you the manager?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: You gonna be the coach too?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: And you don't know the fellows' names?
Abbott: Well I should.
Costello: Well then who's on first?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: I mean the fellow's name.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The guy on first.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The first baseman.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The guy playing...
Abbott: Who is on first!
Costello: I'm asking YOU who's on first.
Abbott: That's the man's name.
Costello: That's who's name?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: Well go ahead and tell me.
Abbott: That's it.
Costello: That's who?
Abbott: Yes.
PAUSE
Costello: Look, you gotta first baseman?
Abbott: Certainly.
Costello: Who's playing first?
Abbott: That's right.
Costello: When you pay off the first baseman every month, who gets the money?
Abbott: Every dollar of it.
Costello: All I'm trying to find out is the fellow's name on first base.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The guy that gets...
Abbott: That's it.
Costello: Who gets the money...
Abbott: He does, every dollar. Sometimes his wife comes down and collects it.
Costello: Who's wife?
Abbott: Yes.
PAUSE
Abbott: What's wrong with that?
Costello: Look, all I wanna know is when you sign up the first baseman, how does he sign his name?
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The guy.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: How does he sign...
Abbott: That's how he signs it.
Costello: Who?
Abbott: Yes.
PAUSE
Costello: All I'm trying to find out is what's the guy's name on first base.
Abbott: No. What is on second base.
Costello: I'm not asking you who's on second.
Abbott: Who's on first.
Costello: One base at a time!
Abbott: Well, don't change the players around.
Costello: I'm not changing nobody!
Abbott: Take it easy, buddy.
Costello: I'm only asking you, who's the guy on first base?
Abbott: That's right.
Costello: Ok.
Abbott: All right.
PAUSE
Costello: What's the guy's name on first base?
Abbott: No. What is on second.
Costello: I'm not asking you who's on second.
Abbott: Who's on first.
Costello: I don't know.
Abbott: He's on third, we're not talking about him.
Costello: Now how did I get on third base?
Abbott: Why you mentioned his name.
Costello: If I mentioned the third baseman's name, who did I say is playing third?
Abbott: No. Who's playing first.
Costello: What's on first?
Abbott: What's on second.
Costello: I don't know.
Abbott: He's on third.
Costello: There I go, back on third again!
PAUSE
Costello: Would you just stay on third base and don't go off it.
Abbott: All right, what do you want to know?
Costello: Now who's playing third base?
Abbott: Why do you insist on putting Who on third base?
Costello: What am I putting on third.
Abbott: No. What is on second.
Costello: You don't want who on second?
Abbott: Who is on first.
Costello: I don't know.
Abbott & Costello Together:Third base!
PAUSE
Costello: Look, you gotta outfield?
Abbott: Sure.
Costello: The left fielder's name?
Abbott: Why.
Costello: I just thought I'd ask you.
Abbott: Well, I just thought I'd tell ya.
Costello: Then tell me who's playing left field.
Abbott: Who's playing first.
Costello: I'm not... stay out of the infield! I want to know what's the guy's name in left field?
Abbott: No, What is on second.
Costello: I'm not asking you who's on second.
Abbott: Who's on first!
Costello: I don't know.
Abbott & Costello Together: Third base!
PAUSE
Costello: The left fielder's name?
Abbott: Why.
Costello: Because!
Abbott: Oh, he's centerfield.
PAUSE
Costello: Look, You gotta pitcher on this team?
Abbott: Sure.
Costello: The pitcher's name?
Abbott: Tomorrow.
Costello: You don't want to tell me today?
Abbott: I'm telling you now.
Costello: Then go ahead.
Abbott: Tomorrow!
Costello: What time?
Abbott: What time what?
Costello: What time tomorrow are you gonna tell me who's pitching?
Abbott: Now listen. Who is not pitching.
Costello: I'll break your arm, you say who's on first! I want to know what's the pitcher's name?
Abbott: What's on second.
Costello: I don't know.
Abbott & Costello Together: Third base!
PAUSE
Costello: Gotta a catcher?
Abbott: Certainly.
Costello: The catcher's name?
Abbott: Today.
Costello: Today, and tomorrow's pitching.
Abbott: Now you've got it.
Costello: All we got is a couple of days on the team.
PAUSE
Costello: You know I'm a catcher too.
Abbott: So they tell me.
Costello: I get behind the plate to do some fancy catching, Tomorrow's pitching on my team and a heavy hitter gets up. Now the heavy hitter bunts the ball. When he bunts the ball, me, being a good catcher, I'm gonna throw the guy out at first base. So I pick up the ball and throw it to who?
Abbott: Now that's the first thing you've said right.
Costello: I don't even know what I'm talking about!
PAUSE
Abbott: That's all you have to do.
Costello: Is to throw the ball to first base.
Abbott: Yes!
Costello: Now who's got it?
Abbott: Naturally.
PAUSE
Costello: Look, if I throw the ball to first base, somebody's gotta get it. Now who has it?
Abbott: Naturally.
Costello: Who?
Abbott: Naturally.
Costello: Naturally?
Abbott: Naturally.
Costello: So I pick up the ball and I throw it to Naturally.
Abbott: No you don't, you throw the ball to Who.
Costello: Naturally.
Abbott: That's different.
Costello: That's what I said.
Abbott: You're not saying it...
Costello: I throw the ball to Naturally.
Abbott: You throw it to Who.
Costello: Naturally.
Abbott: That's it.
Costello: That's what I said!
Abbott: You ask me.
Costello: I throw the ball to who?
Abbott: Naturally.
Costello: Now you ask me.
Abbott: You throw the ball to Who?
Costello: Naturally.
Abbott: That's it.
Costello: Same as you! Same as YOU! I throw the ball to who. Whoever it is drops the ball and the guy runs to second. Who picks up the ball and throws it to What. What throws it to I Don't Know. I Don't Know throws it back to Tomorrow, Triple play. Another guy gets up and hits a long fly ball to Because. Why? I don't know! He's on third and I don't give a darn!
Abbott: What?
Costello: I said I don't give a darn!
Abbott: Oh, that's our shortstop.
-Imp
-
iambiguous
- Posts: 7750
- Joined: Mon Nov 22, 2010 10:23 pm
Re: Quote of the day
Time
“Realize deeply that the present moment is all you will ever have. Eckhart Tolle
Seriously though, just how long is a moment?
“The role played by time at the beginning of the universe is, I believe, the final key to removing the need for a Grand Designer, and revealing how the universe created itself. Time itself must come to a stop. You can’t get to a time before the big bang, because there was no time before the big bang. We have finally found something that does not have a cause because there was no time for a cause to exist in. For me this means there is no possibility of a creator because there is no time for a creator to have existed. Since time itself began at the moment of the Big Bang, it was an event that could not have been caused or created by anyone or anything. … So when people ask me if a god created the universe, I tell them the question itself makes no sense. Time didn’t exist before the Big Bang, so there is no time for God to make the universe in. It’s like asking for directions to the edge of the Earth. The Earth is a sphere. It does not have an edge, so looking for it is a futile exercise." Stephen W. Hawking
Unless, of course, he's wrong.
“Everything changed the day she figured out there was exactly enough time for the important things in her life.” Brian Andreas
In other words, she stopped posting here.
He said in jest.
“The main problem with this great obsession for saving time is very simple: you can't save time. You can only spend it. But you can spend it wisely or foolishly.” Benjamin Hoff
Right, like no one ever confuses one for the other.
“Time heals all wounds. But not this one. Not yet.” Marie Lu, Champion
Though surely by now.
“Thirty years ago my older brother, who was ten years old at the time, was trying to get a report written on birds that he'd had three months to write, which was due the next day. We were out at our family cabin in Bolinas, and he was at the kitchen table close to tears, surrounded by binder paper and pencils and unopened books about birds, immobilized by the hugeness of the task ahead. Then my father sat down beside him put his arm around my brother's shoulder, and said, "Bird by bird, buddy. Just take it bird by bird.” Anne Lamott
And, of course, the equivalent of that here.
“Realize deeply that the present moment is all you will ever have. Eckhart Tolle
Seriously though, just how long is a moment?
“The role played by time at the beginning of the universe is, I believe, the final key to removing the need for a Grand Designer, and revealing how the universe created itself. Time itself must come to a stop. You can’t get to a time before the big bang, because there was no time before the big bang. We have finally found something that does not have a cause because there was no time for a cause to exist in. For me this means there is no possibility of a creator because there is no time for a creator to have existed. Since time itself began at the moment of the Big Bang, it was an event that could not have been caused or created by anyone or anything. … So when people ask me if a god created the universe, I tell them the question itself makes no sense. Time didn’t exist before the Big Bang, so there is no time for God to make the universe in. It’s like asking for directions to the edge of the Earth. The Earth is a sphere. It does not have an edge, so looking for it is a futile exercise." Stephen W. Hawking
Unless, of course, he's wrong.
“Everything changed the day she figured out there was exactly enough time for the important things in her life.” Brian Andreas
In other words, she stopped posting here.
He said in jest.
“The main problem with this great obsession for saving time is very simple: you can't save time. You can only spend it. But you can spend it wisely or foolishly.” Benjamin Hoff
Right, like no one ever confuses one for the other.
“Time heals all wounds. But not this one. Not yet.” Marie Lu, Champion
Though surely by now.
“Thirty years ago my older brother, who was ten years old at the time, was trying to get a report written on birds that he'd had three months to write, which was due the next day. We were out at our family cabin in Bolinas, and he was at the kitchen table close to tears, surrounded by binder paper and pencils and unopened books about birds, immobilized by the hugeness of the task ahead. Then my father sat down beside him put his arm around my brother's shoulder, and said, "Bird by bird, buddy. Just take it bird by bird.” Anne Lamott
And, of course, the equivalent of that here.
-
iambiguous
- Posts: 7750
- Joined: Mon Nov 22, 2010 10:23 pm
Re: Quote of the day
Un Coeur en Hiver
Camille: You might have sruples about seeing me because he is your friend.
Stephane: There’s no friendship between us.
Camille: No friendship?
Stephane: No. We’ve been partners for years. We complement each other.
Camille: He thinks of you as a friend.
Stephane: I can’t prevent that.
Camille: I don’t believe you.
Stephane: Why? Because it’s not something one admits? But it’s true. Are you shocked?
Camille: No. Saddened.
Stephane: Misusing words is sad.
Camille: You devalue them and everything else…You aren’t like that. Nobody is. It doesn’t happen. It’s a pose.
Stephane: What do you want? Do you want me to invent reasons, traumas? Unhappy childhood, sexual frustration, career nipped in the bud?
See? He explains it and it just goes over her head.
Sort of like with me here.
Camille: You act as though emotions don’t exist. Yet you love music.
Stephane: Music is the stuff of dreams.
How to explain music...philosophically?
Camille: I’m feeling low, Maxime. I don’t feel good about myself. And not because of the sonatas.
Maxime: Stephane…
Oh, yeah.
Camille: It was you I played for…I spoke to Maxime. About us. It was hard. He heard me out. I told him what’s happened. I want you. It’s not like me but I had to tell you.
Stephane: Camille…I don’t think I can give you what you are looking for.
Camille: You want it to. I know you and accept you as your are. I don’t mind about this close world you built around yourself long ago. I’m here for you. Look at me…You can’t go on living like that. You must see that you’re changing.
Stephane: Camille…You’re beautiful. You’re going to be a great musician. You have almost a surfeit of gifts…But you’re fooling yourself. You insist on seeing me as you imagine me…as someone else. But I’m not that person.
Camille: Don’t deceive yourself. It’s so simple.
Stephan: I must tell you the truth. I’d decided to seduce you, without loving you…probably to get at Maxime…You don’t understand Camille. You talk of feelings which don’t exist…to which I have no access. I don’t love you. [pause] You know…
Camille: Don’t talk, please. Don’t look at me.
In one ear and out the other. Though understandably, right?
Still, try, try again:
Camille [later, in a restaurant]: We can’t leave it like this. I can’t accept it. Say something.
Stephane: Camille, I told you the truth.
Camille: You know you didn’t. At the studio that day it rained, I didn’t imagine your attentiveness.
Stephane: That’s my job.
Camille: Don’t tell me I was just like some musician on TV.
Stephane: No. Certainly not.
Camille: Your way of looking at me…
Stephane: I was sincere.
Camille: Everything we said to each other.
Stephane: But we didn’t say anything.
Camille: Oh, but we did. Or was it I who…No, it’s not possible. It’s not…possible. But why?
Stephane: I told you why.
At least he's convinced that he has.
Camille: But if it was just to get at Maxime, you should have fucked me. Sordid, but at least it’s life.
Even the part about Maxime, however, is hopelessly ambiguous.
Camille: Ah, it seems he loves music because it’s the stuff of dreams and has nothing to do with life. You know nothing of dreams. You have no imagination, no heart, no balls!
On the other hand, what does it really mean to “have” things like this?
Lachaume: What did you have in mind? Disrupting things. The pleasure of demystification? But one can’t demystify feelings.
Unless, perhaps, you root them in dasein?
Amet [to Stephane regarding Lachaume’s wish to die]: He’s been asking for three days. But I can’t. I can’t.
So, Stephane does it.
Camille: You might have sruples about seeing me because he is your friend.
Stephane: There’s no friendship between us.
Camille: No friendship?
Stephane: No. We’ve been partners for years. We complement each other.
Camille: He thinks of you as a friend.
Stephane: I can’t prevent that.
Camille: I don’t believe you.
Stephane: Why? Because it’s not something one admits? But it’s true. Are you shocked?
Camille: No. Saddened.
Stephane: Misusing words is sad.
Camille: You devalue them and everything else…You aren’t like that. Nobody is. It doesn’t happen. It’s a pose.
Stephane: What do you want? Do you want me to invent reasons, traumas? Unhappy childhood, sexual frustration, career nipped in the bud?
See? He explains it and it just goes over her head.
Sort of like with me here.
Camille: You act as though emotions don’t exist. Yet you love music.
Stephane: Music is the stuff of dreams.
How to explain music...philosophically?
Camille: I’m feeling low, Maxime. I don’t feel good about myself. And not because of the sonatas.
Maxime: Stephane…
Oh, yeah.
Camille: It was you I played for…I spoke to Maxime. About us. It was hard. He heard me out. I told him what’s happened. I want you. It’s not like me but I had to tell you.
Stephane: Camille…I don’t think I can give you what you are looking for.
Camille: You want it to. I know you and accept you as your are. I don’t mind about this close world you built around yourself long ago. I’m here for you. Look at me…You can’t go on living like that. You must see that you’re changing.
Stephane: Camille…You’re beautiful. You’re going to be a great musician. You have almost a surfeit of gifts…But you’re fooling yourself. You insist on seeing me as you imagine me…as someone else. But I’m not that person.
Camille: Don’t deceive yourself. It’s so simple.
Stephan: I must tell you the truth. I’d decided to seduce you, without loving you…probably to get at Maxime…You don’t understand Camille. You talk of feelings which don’t exist…to which I have no access. I don’t love you. [pause] You know…
Camille: Don’t talk, please. Don’t look at me.
In one ear and out the other. Though understandably, right?
Still, try, try again:
Camille [later, in a restaurant]: We can’t leave it like this. I can’t accept it. Say something.
Stephane: Camille, I told you the truth.
Camille: You know you didn’t. At the studio that day it rained, I didn’t imagine your attentiveness.
Stephane: That’s my job.
Camille: Don’t tell me I was just like some musician on TV.
Stephane: No. Certainly not.
Camille: Your way of looking at me…
Stephane: I was sincere.
Camille: Everything we said to each other.
Stephane: But we didn’t say anything.
Camille: Oh, but we did. Or was it I who…No, it’s not possible. It’s not…possible. But why?
Stephane: I told you why.
At least he's convinced that he has.
Camille: But if it was just to get at Maxime, you should have fucked me. Sordid, but at least it’s life.
Even the part about Maxime, however, is hopelessly ambiguous.
Camille: Ah, it seems he loves music because it’s the stuff of dreams and has nothing to do with life. You know nothing of dreams. You have no imagination, no heart, no balls!
On the other hand, what does it really mean to “have” things like this?
Lachaume: What did you have in mind? Disrupting things. The pleasure of demystification? But one can’t demystify feelings.
Unless, perhaps, you root them in dasein?
Amet [to Stephane regarding Lachaume’s wish to die]: He’s been asking for three days. But I can’t. I can’t.
So, Stephane does it.
-
iambiguous
- Posts: 7750
- Joined: Mon Nov 22, 2010 10:23 pm
Re: Quote of the day
Lost In America
David: Sleeping?
Linda: Yes.
David: Maybe we shouldn’t move.
Linda: (sitting up) Oh God. What’s the matter now?
David: Nothing. It’s just time to ask these questions.
Linda: No. We’ve sold our house and bought another one. These questions should have been asked before…You’re just nervous about tomorrow. You’ll get your promotion, don’t worry. We’ll move into our new house and we’ll be happy, okay?
And if he doesn't get the promotion?
David Howard: Shut up Brad! Your song stunk, I hate your suit and I could hurt you!
See? No promotion. But he does get fired.
Linda: I don’t believe you. One minute you want a tennis court, the next minute you’re worried about the movers packing a box? My God. Sometimes I wish we were a little more irresponsible.
David: What does that mean?
Linda: Nothing. Look, get some sleep, okay?
David: What do you mean “nothing”? If you’re saying we should be more irresponsible, I imagine you mean we’re too responsible? Is that right?
Linda: Well, sometimes I think that we are too controlled, yes.
David: Oh, I see. Well, tell me something? How do you go out and buy a four-hundred-thousand-dollar house and let a moving company pack everything and get maids and servants and live the good life and not be controlled?
Good point?
David [to Linda]: It’s time to get out. We have to touch Indians.
Next up: the casino.
David: This is what we talked about when we were 19. Remember we kept saying “Let’s find ourselves,” but we didn’t have a dollar so we watched TV. Linda, this is just like Easy Rider except now it’s our turn. We can drop out and still have our nest egg.
Nest egg. Look for that expression to pop up again.
David: We don’t want to stay in Las Vegas. It represents everything we left. This is the worst money-grubbing place in the world.
Linda: Yeah, I know. But just for tonight. Wouldn’t it be fun to have room service, make love in a big bed and watch porno movies.
David: Porno movies? But we want to touch Indians.
Here we go!
David: Sleeping?
Linda: Yes.
David: Maybe we shouldn’t move.
Linda: (sitting up) Oh God. What’s the matter now?
David: Nothing. It’s just time to ask these questions.
Linda: No. We’ve sold our house and bought another one. These questions should have been asked before…You’re just nervous about tomorrow. You’ll get your promotion, don’t worry. We’ll move into our new house and we’ll be happy, okay?
And if he doesn't get the promotion?
David Howard: Shut up Brad! Your song stunk, I hate your suit and I could hurt you!
See? No promotion. But he does get fired.
Linda: I don’t believe you. One minute you want a tennis court, the next minute you’re worried about the movers packing a box? My God. Sometimes I wish we were a little more irresponsible.
David: What does that mean?
Linda: Nothing. Look, get some sleep, okay?
David: What do you mean “nothing”? If you’re saying we should be more irresponsible, I imagine you mean we’re too responsible? Is that right?
Linda: Well, sometimes I think that we are too controlled, yes.
David: Oh, I see. Well, tell me something? How do you go out and buy a four-hundred-thousand-dollar house and let a moving company pack everything and get maids and servants and live the good life and not be controlled?
Good point?
David [to Linda]: It’s time to get out. We have to touch Indians.
Next up: the casino.
David: This is what we talked about when we were 19. Remember we kept saying “Let’s find ourselves,” but we didn’t have a dollar so we watched TV. Linda, this is just like Easy Rider except now it’s our turn. We can drop out and still have our nest egg.
Nest egg. Look for that expression to pop up again.
David: We don’t want to stay in Las Vegas. It represents everything we left. This is the worst money-grubbing place in the world.
Linda: Yeah, I know. But just for tonight. Wouldn’t it be fun to have room service, make love in a big bed and watch porno movies.
David: Porno movies? But we want to touch Indians.
Here we go!
-
iambiguous
- Posts: 7750
- Joined: Mon Nov 22, 2010 10:23 pm
Re: Quote of the day
John Barth
Everyone is necessarily the hero of his own life story.
Or, for some of us, the anti-hero.
Every artist joins a conversation that's been going on for generations, even millennia, before he or she joins the scene.
Wow, what if that were true of philosophers too?!
Somewhere in the world there was a young woman with such splendid understanding that she'd see him entire, like a poem or story, and find his words so valuable after all that when he confessed his apprehensions she would explain why they were in fact the very things that made him precious to her...and to Western Civilization! There was no such girl, the simple truth being.
And certainly no such girl [or boy] here.
The reader! You, dogged, uninsultable, print-oriented bastard, it's you I'm addressing, who else, from inside this monstrous fiction. You've read me this far, then? Even this far? For what discreditable motive? How is it you don't go to a movie, watch TV, stare at a wall, play tennis with a friend, make amorous advances to the person who comes to your mind when I speak of amorous advances? Can nothing surfeit, saturate you, turn you off? Where's your shame?
Next up: the monstrous fiction here.
Self knowledge is always bad news.
If not fractured and fragmented?
I particularly scorn my fondness for paradox. I despise pessimism, narcissism, solipsism, truculence, word-play, and pusillanimity, my chiefer inclinations; loathe self-loathers ergo me; have no pity for self-pity and so am free of that sweet baseness. I doubt I am. Being me’s no joke.
Imagine being me then.
Everyone is necessarily the hero of his own life story.
Or, for some of us, the anti-hero.
Every artist joins a conversation that's been going on for generations, even millennia, before he or she joins the scene.
Wow, what if that were true of philosophers too?!
Somewhere in the world there was a young woman with such splendid understanding that she'd see him entire, like a poem or story, and find his words so valuable after all that when he confessed his apprehensions she would explain why they were in fact the very things that made him precious to her...and to Western Civilization! There was no such girl, the simple truth being.
And certainly no such girl [or boy] here.
The reader! You, dogged, uninsultable, print-oriented bastard, it's you I'm addressing, who else, from inside this monstrous fiction. You've read me this far, then? Even this far? For what discreditable motive? How is it you don't go to a movie, watch TV, stare at a wall, play tennis with a friend, make amorous advances to the person who comes to your mind when I speak of amorous advances? Can nothing surfeit, saturate you, turn you off? Where's your shame?
Next up: the monstrous fiction here.
Self knowledge is always bad news.
If not fractured and fragmented?
I particularly scorn my fondness for paradox. I despise pessimism, narcissism, solipsism, truculence, word-play, and pusillanimity, my chiefer inclinations; loathe self-loathers ergo me; have no pity for self-pity and so am free of that sweet baseness. I doubt I am. Being me’s no joke.
Imagine being me then.
-
iambiguous
- Posts: 7750
- Joined: Mon Nov 22, 2010 10:23 pm
Re: Quote of the day
Lost In America
Casino security: Hey, you can’t come in here dressed like that.
David: I saw Electric Horseman. An animal rode through here with lights on.
Of course, that was just a movie.
Linda [still droning on, as though in a trance] : Twenty-two. Twenty-two. Twenty-two.
[It hits twenty-two]
David [whooping]: All right, all right. I’m sorry. How much?
Croupier: $35.
David: We’re up.
Linda: We’re still down.
David: How much?
Linda: Down.
David [going over to the casina manager]: How much?
Pit boss: Down!
David [to Linda]: What does that mean? How much have you lost?
Linda: Everything.
Yep: the nestegg.
David: The cash in the room, you took that?
Linda: Yes.
David: You cashed your personal checks?
Linda: Yes.
David: You didn’t touch the traveler’s checks.
Linda: Yes.
David: No! The core of the nest egg!!
Everything!
David [to Linda]: If you pick up that Keno card, I’ll kill you.
Next up: Poweball.
David [to Shuster the Casino manager]: My wife and I have dropped out of society and we are just going to roam across the county and find ourselves…We lost out nest egg here.
Shuster: I realize you lost a great deal of money. Your room and your food. Comped. Free.
David, however, has another idea...
David: Here’s my idea. As the boldest experiment in advertising history, you give us our money back.
Shuster: I beg your pardon?
David: Give us our money back. Think of the publicity! I mean, the Hilton, for example, they have billboards all over L.A. where they put the faces of the winners of those slot machines. Now, those people win a couple hundred thousand dollars, but the hotel is getting millions of dollars of publicity with those billboards because people drive by and say, “Gee, the Hilton looks like a nice place. Look at those smiling people.” So, what about a billboard with my wife and I on it and we would be smiling and there would be a saying, something like, “These people dropped out of society, they couldn’t take it any longer, but they made a mistake. They lost their nest egg at The Desert Inn, but The Desert Inn gave it back.” This gives the Desert Inn…Vegas is not associated with feeling.
Shuster: First of all, those people on the signs, they won. You lost…If we give you your money back everyone will want their money back. Gamblers will say, “Hey, go to the Desert Inn. If you lose, you’ll get your money back!”
That's probably true, isn't it?
Linda: Why don’t we talk about we are going to do now. Our dream is the same, we just don’t have any money. And we should stop saying that we don’t have any money because we do have some.
David [in a monotone]: We have $802.
And change.
Casino security: Hey, you can’t come in here dressed like that.
David: I saw Electric Horseman. An animal rode through here with lights on.
Of course, that was just a movie.
Linda [still droning on, as though in a trance] : Twenty-two. Twenty-two. Twenty-two.
[It hits twenty-two]
David [whooping]: All right, all right. I’m sorry. How much?
Croupier: $35.
David: We’re up.
Linda: We’re still down.
David: How much?
Linda: Down.
David [going over to the casina manager]: How much?
Pit boss: Down!
David [to Linda]: What does that mean? How much have you lost?
Linda: Everything.
Yep: the nestegg.
David: The cash in the room, you took that?
Linda: Yes.
David: You cashed your personal checks?
Linda: Yes.
David: You didn’t touch the traveler’s checks.
Linda: Yes.
David: No! The core of the nest egg!!
Everything!
David [to Linda]: If you pick up that Keno card, I’ll kill you.
Next up: Poweball.
David [to Shuster the Casino manager]: My wife and I have dropped out of society and we are just going to roam across the county and find ourselves…We lost out nest egg here.
Shuster: I realize you lost a great deal of money. Your room and your food. Comped. Free.
David, however, has another idea...
David: Here’s my idea. As the boldest experiment in advertising history, you give us our money back.
Shuster: I beg your pardon?
David: Give us our money back. Think of the publicity! I mean, the Hilton, for example, they have billboards all over L.A. where they put the faces of the winners of those slot machines. Now, those people win a couple hundred thousand dollars, but the hotel is getting millions of dollars of publicity with those billboards because people drive by and say, “Gee, the Hilton looks like a nice place. Look at those smiling people.” So, what about a billboard with my wife and I on it and we would be smiling and there would be a saying, something like, “These people dropped out of society, they couldn’t take it any longer, but they made a mistake. They lost their nest egg at The Desert Inn, but The Desert Inn gave it back.” This gives the Desert Inn…Vegas is not associated with feeling.
Shuster: First of all, those people on the signs, they won. You lost…If we give you your money back everyone will want their money back. Gamblers will say, “Hey, go to the Desert Inn. If you lose, you’ll get your money back!”
That's probably true, isn't it?
Linda: Why don’t we talk about we are going to do now. Our dream is the same, we just don’t have any money. And we should stop saying that we don’t have any money because we do have some.
David [in a monotone]: We have $802.
And change.
-
iambiguous
- Posts: 7750
- Joined: Mon Nov 22, 2010 10:23 pm
Re: Quote of the day
God
“Don't be more serious than God. God invented dog farts. God designed your body's plumbing system. God designed an ostrich. If He didn't do it, He permitted a drunken angel to do it. Empirical facts can add significantly to the meaning of "being godlike". Peter Kreeft
Let's take it from there.
“A God who could make good children as easily a bad, yet preferred to make bad ones; who could have made every one of them happy, yet never made a single happy one; who made them prize their bitter life, yet stingily cut it short; who gave his angels eternal happiness unearned, yet required his other children to earn it; who gave is angels painless lives, yet cursed his other children with biting miseries and maladies of mind and body; who mouths justice, and invented hell--mouths mercy, and invented hell--mouths Golden Rules and forgiveness multiplied by seventy times seven, and invented hell; who mouths morals to other people, and has none himself; who frowns upon crimes, yet commits them all; who created man without invitation, then tries to shuffle the responsibility for man's acts upon man, instead of honorably placing it where it belongs, upon himself; and finally, with altogether divine obtuseness, invites his poor abused slave to worship him!” Mark Twain
Let's take it from there.
“You said 'God is cruel' the way a person who's lived his whole life on Tahiti might say 'Snow is cold'. You knew, but you didn't understand." He stepped close to David and put his palms on the boy's cold cheeks. "Do you know how cruel your God can be, David. How fantastically cruel?” Stephen King
You know what's coming...
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lists_of_earthquakes
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_l ... _eruptions
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_t ... l_cyclones
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_tsunamis
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_landslides
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_fires
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_epidemics
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_deadliest_floods
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_t ... ore_deaths
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lists_of_diseases
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_extinction_events
“The Christian religion is a very powerful and convincing mistake.”Philip Pullman
Not unlike all the rest of them?
“Their position seems to be that their God is so great he doesn't even have to exist.” Carl Sagan
You tell me.
“In great contests each party claims to act in accordance with the will of God. Both may be, and one must be wrong. God cannot be for, and against the same thing at the same time.” Abraham Lincoln
So much for omnipotence?
“Don't be more serious than God. God invented dog farts. God designed your body's plumbing system. God designed an ostrich. If He didn't do it, He permitted a drunken angel to do it. Empirical facts can add significantly to the meaning of "being godlike". Peter Kreeft
Let's take it from there.
“A God who could make good children as easily a bad, yet preferred to make bad ones; who could have made every one of them happy, yet never made a single happy one; who made them prize their bitter life, yet stingily cut it short; who gave his angels eternal happiness unearned, yet required his other children to earn it; who gave is angels painless lives, yet cursed his other children with biting miseries and maladies of mind and body; who mouths justice, and invented hell--mouths mercy, and invented hell--mouths Golden Rules and forgiveness multiplied by seventy times seven, and invented hell; who mouths morals to other people, and has none himself; who frowns upon crimes, yet commits them all; who created man without invitation, then tries to shuffle the responsibility for man's acts upon man, instead of honorably placing it where it belongs, upon himself; and finally, with altogether divine obtuseness, invites his poor abused slave to worship him!” Mark Twain
Let's take it from there.
“You said 'God is cruel' the way a person who's lived his whole life on Tahiti might say 'Snow is cold'. You knew, but you didn't understand." He stepped close to David and put his palms on the boy's cold cheeks. "Do you know how cruel your God can be, David. How fantastically cruel?” Stephen King
You know what's coming...
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lists_of_earthquakes
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_l ... _eruptions
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_t ... l_cyclones
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_tsunamis
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_landslides
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_fires
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_epidemics
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_deadliest_floods
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_t ... ore_deaths
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lists_of_diseases
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_extinction_events
“The Christian religion is a very powerful and convincing mistake.”Philip Pullman
Not unlike all the rest of them?
“Their position seems to be that their God is so great he doesn't even have to exist.” Carl Sagan
You tell me.
“In great contests each party claims to act in accordance with the will of God. Both may be, and one must be wrong. God cannot be for, and against the same thing at the same time.” Abraham Lincoln
So much for omnipotence?
-
iambiguous
- Posts: 7750
- Joined: Mon Nov 22, 2010 10:23 pm
Re: Quote of the day
Lost In America
Linda: In the movie you are basing your whole life on, Easy Rider, they had nothing. They had no nest egg!
David: Bullshit! They had a giant nest egg. They had all that cocaine!
On the other hand, bang! bang!
They're dead.
Employment Agent: What was you previous salary?
David: $80,000 was the base salary and then I was on a bonus situation which would give me anywhere between $15,000 and $25,000 more. Generally around $100,000 a year.
Employment Agent: What bring’s you around these parts? Trying to double up on that income?
That and touch Indians.
Employment Agent: I have jobs, but coming from your position and salary you wouldn’t be interested in them.
David: You don’t know me. I might love it.
Employment Agent: A crossing guard.
David: A crossing guard. What is that? At a school?
Employment Agent: Where else have you seen them work?
David: What does that pay?
Employment Agent: $100,000
[he bursts out laughing]
David: What does it really pay?
Employment Agent: It pays $5.50 an hour plus benefits.
David: And the benefits meaning?
Employment Agent: You get a ride to and from school if you need it.
David: Can’t you wrack your brains? Isn’t there an executive file? Or maybe you have a white-collar box or something?
Employment Agent: What sort of box would that be?
David: Just a box for higher paying jobs.
Employment Agent: Oh, I know! You mean the $100,000 box!
I'd have socked the bastard myself.
David: Well, I’m glad I could be your morning entertainment. But I want to tell you something. I made a statement. I made a statement.
Employment Agent: A statement?
David: Yes. Did you see Easy Rider?
Employment Agent: No. But I saw “Easy Money.” Rodney Dangerfield, I like him.
The masses!!!
David: Don’t get me wrong. I’ve had a lot of fun these last two weeks. Things didn’t go like we hoped but if we’re still together now, after what happened, we won’t split up. That makes me feel great, and I’m real happy.
Linda: Isn’t that wonderful? I told you this would be a blessing.
David: Right. But given our ages and these jobs, we won’t see another nest egg for…ever. I think that there has to be some better way to rebuild than this. I thought of a plan that might speed things up and I thought maybe I should sound it out with you.
Linda: Really? I was kind of thinking the same things, too.
David: You were?
Linda: I was.
David: What is it?
Linda: What was your plan?
David: My plan is not a plan, just a back-up. What’s your plan?
Linda: I was thinking we go to New York as fast as we can.
David: And I eat shit?
Linda: Yeah.
David: My plan, too!
Lost in America!
David: Brad!
Remember him?
Linda: In the movie you are basing your whole life on, Easy Rider, they had nothing. They had no nest egg!
David: Bullshit! They had a giant nest egg. They had all that cocaine!
On the other hand, bang! bang!
They're dead.
Employment Agent: What was you previous salary?
David: $80,000 was the base salary and then I was on a bonus situation which would give me anywhere between $15,000 and $25,000 more. Generally around $100,000 a year.
Employment Agent: What bring’s you around these parts? Trying to double up on that income?
That and touch Indians.
Employment Agent: I have jobs, but coming from your position and salary you wouldn’t be interested in them.
David: You don’t know me. I might love it.
Employment Agent: A crossing guard.
David: A crossing guard. What is that? At a school?
Employment Agent: Where else have you seen them work?
David: What does that pay?
Employment Agent: $100,000
[he bursts out laughing]
David: What does it really pay?
Employment Agent: It pays $5.50 an hour plus benefits.
David: And the benefits meaning?
Employment Agent: You get a ride to and from school if you need it.
David: Can’t you wrack your brains? Isn’t there an executive file? Or maybe you have a white-collar box or something?
Employment Agent: What sort of box would that be?
David: Just a box for higher paying jobs.
Employment Agent: Oh, I know! You mean the $100,000 box!
I'd have socked the bastard myself.
David: Well, I’m glad I could be your morning entertainment. But I want to tell you something. I made a statement. I made a statement.
Employment Agent: A statement?
David: Yes. Did you see Easy Rider?
Employment Agent: No. But I saw “Easy Money.” Rodney Dangerfield, I like him.
The masses!!!
David: Don’t get me wrong. I’ve had a lot of fun these last two weeks. Things didn’t go like we hoped but if we’re still together now, after what happened, we won’t split up. That makes me feel great, and I’m real happy.
Linda: Isn’t that wonderful? I told you this would be a blessing.
David: Right. But given our ages and these jobs, we won’t see another nest egg for…ever. I think that there has to be some better way to rebuild than this. I thought of a plan that might speed things up and I thought maybe I should sound it out with you.
Linda: Really? I was kind of thinking the same things, too.
David: You were?
Linda: I was.
David: What is it?
Linda: What was your plan?
David: My plan is not a plan, just a back-up. What’s your plan?
Linda: I was thinking we go to New York as fast as we can.
David: And I eat shit?
Linda: Yeah.
David: My plan, too!
Lost in America!
David: Brad!
Remember him?
-
iambiguous
- Posts: 7750
- Joined: Mon Nov 22, 2010 10:23 pm
Re: Quote of the day
8 Mile
Jimmy Smith Jr: Fuck a beat, I'll go A Capella. Fuck a Papa Doc, fuck a clock, fuck a trailer, fuck everybody. Fuck y'all if you doubt me. I'm a piece of fuckin' white trash, I say it proudly. And fuck this battle, I don't want to win, I'm outtie. Here, tell these people something they don't know about me.
cRap some call it.
Stephanie: Me and Greg are having problems.
B. Rabbit: He found out about the eviction?
Stephanie: No.
B. Rabbit: The settlement check aint coming?
Stephanie: No, it's comin' it's comin'... it's our sex life.
B. Rabbit: [disgusted] Mom, I don't wanna hear this shit.
Stephanie: I mean it's good, it's real good. He just doesn't like to...
B. Rabbit: [interupting] Mom, I don't wanna hear this.
Stephanie: Greg won't go down on me.
B. Rabbit: [more disgusted] Mom!
[Shuts the bathroom door in her face]
Trailer trash some call them.
B. Rabbit: Ward, I think you were a little hard on the beaver. So was Eddie Haskell, Wally, and Mrs. Cleaver.
And don't forget Lumpy.
Alex: [to Jimmy] So how come they call you rabbit?
Future: Cause he's fast and he likes to fuck a lot.
Actually...
Stephanie: I gave 'im that nickname. When he was little he had these buck teeth and big ears and he was so cute, wike a wittle rabbit.
Next up: the B.
Lyckety-Splyt: Listen up now! Leaders in the Free World in the motherfucking house. Me and Papa Doc will battle any motherfuckers here.
Future: Fuck the Free World.
Cheddar Bob: Yeah! Fuck the Free World!
Lyckety-Splyt: Fuck the Free World? You 313 bitches is wack. Ayo, fat ass! Yeah, I'm talking about your man Sol. I better kick you in your chest and porkchops fall out your asshole. You cats is pussy, soft like wet flowers. Leaders of the Free World here to smash on you cowards. Look at Future.
Future: Look, don't even start, nigga.
Papa Doc: What you gonna do about it, faggot?
Future: Who are you calling a faggot?
Papa Doc: Don't play yourself, bitch.
Lyckety-Splyt: Hold up! Yo, Elvis. You don't wanna step to this. You need to take that white rap shit of yours back across 8 Mile. Caught your choke act at the shelter last night.
[Lyckety-Splyt started imitating a cough, Jimmy makes him fall in the car Hood, then a fight begins]
Lyckety-Splyt?
DJ Iz: Man, do you know how many abandoned buildings we have in Detroit? I mean, how are you supposed to take pride in your neighborhood with shit like that next door? And does the city tear them down? No, they too busy building casinos and taking money from the people.
Future: [Talking to Iz while rolling another joint] Shut yo preaching ass up! Don’t nobody care about that shit.
DJ Iz: Did you care when that crackhead raped that little girl? You think that woulda’ happened if he didn’t have an abandoned house to take her to?
Cheddar Bob: They caught him didn’t they?
Future: Yeah, they caught him. Dumb motherfucker went back to the house. How stupid could a nigga be?
Sometimes stupidity is the best we can hope for.
Rabbit: Shit wrong with a free demo?
Future: Free comes with a dick up your ass, Jimmy.
Anything free here?
Jimmy Smith Jr: Fuck a beat, I'll go A Capella. Fuck a Papa Doc, fuck a clock, fuck a trailer, fuck everybody. Fuck y'all if you doubt me. I'm a piece of fuckin' white trash, I say it proudly. And fuck this battle, I don't want to win, I'm outtie. Here, tell these people something they don't know about me.
cRap some call it.
Stephanie: Me and Greg are having problems.
B. Rabbit: He found out about the eviction?
Stephanie: No.
B. Rabbit: The settlement check aint coming?
Stephanie: No, it's comin' it's comin'... it's our sex life.
B. Rabbit: [disgusted] Mom, I don't wanna hear this shit.
Stephanie: I mean it's good, it's real good. He just doesn't like to...
B. Rabbit: [interupting] Mom, I don't wanna hear this.
Stephanie: Greg won't go down on me.
B. Rabbit: [more disgusted] Mom!
[Shuts the bathroom door in her face]
Trailer trash some call them.
B. Rabbit: Ward, I think you were a little hard on the beaver. So was Eddie Haskell, Wally, and Mrs. Cleaver.
And don't forget Lumpy.
Alex: [to Jimmy] So how come they call you rabbit?
Future: Cause he's fast and he likes to fuck a lot.
Actually...
Stephanie: I gave 'im that nickname. When he was little he had these buck teeth and big ears and he was so cute, wike a wittle rabbit.
Next up: the B.
Lyckety-Splyt: Listen up now! Leaders in the Free World in the motherfucking house. Me and Papa Doc will battle any motherfuckers here.
Future: Fuck the Free World.
Cheddar Bob: Yeah! Fuck the Free World!
Lyckety-Splyt: Fuck the Free World? You 313 bitches is wack. Ayo, fat ass! Yeah, I'm talking about your man Sol. I better kick you in your chest and porkchops fall out your asshole. You cats is pussy, soft like wet flowers. Leaders of the Free World here to smash on you cowards. Look at Future.
Future: Look, don't even start, nigga.
Papa Doc: What you gonna do about it, faggot?
Future: Who are you calling a faggot?
Papa Doc: Don't play yourself, bitch.
Lyckety-Splyt: Hold up! Yo, Elvis. You don't wanna step to this. You need to take that white rap shit of yours back across 8 Mile. Caught your choke act at the shelter last night.
[Lyckety-Splyt started imitating a cough, Jimmy makes him fall in the car Hood, then a fight begins]
Lyckety-Splyt?
DJ Iz: Man, do you know how many abandoned buildings we have in Detroit? I mean, how are you supposed to take pride in your neighborhood with shit like that next door? And does the city tear them down? No, they too busy building casinos and taking money from the people.
Future: [Talking to Iz while rolling another joint] Shut yo preaching ass up! Don’t nobody care about that shit.
DJ Iz: Did you care when that crackhead raped that little girl? You think that woulda’ happened if he didn’t have an abandoned house to take her to?
Cheddar Bob: They caught him didn’t they?
Future: Yeah, they caught him. Dumb motherfucker went back to the house. How stupid could a nigga be?
Sometimes stupidity is the best we can hope for.
Rabbit: Shit wrong with a free demo?
Future: Free comes with a dick up your ass, Jimmy.
Anything free here?
-
iambiguous
- Posts: 7750
- Joined: Mon Nov 22, 2010 10:23 pm
Re: Quote of the day
This Is Spinal Tap
Nigel Tufnel: The numbers all go to eleven. Look, right across the board, eleven, eleven, eleven and...
Marty DiBergi: Oh, I see. And most amps go up to ten?
Nigel Tufnel: Exactly.
Marty DiBergi: Does that mean it's louder? Is it any louder?
Nigel Tufnel: Well, it's one louder, isn't it? It's not ten. You see, most blokes, you know, will be playing at ten. You're on ten here, all the way up, all the way up, all the way up, you're on ten on your guitar. Where can you go from there? Where?
Marty DiBergi: I don't know.
Nigel Tufnel: Nowhere. Exactly. What we do is, if we need that extra push over the cliff, you know what we do?
Marty DiBergi: Put it up to eleven.
Nigel Tufnel: Eleven. Exactly. One louder.
Marty DiBergi: Why don't you just make ten louder and make ten be the top number and make that a little louder?
Nigel Tufnel: [pause] These go to eleven.
Reminds me of this: https://youtu.be/9y5K3KsuQ_M?si=v-u7Qw5IK_6J9POI
[Nigel is playing a soft piece on the piano]
Marty DiBergi: It's very pretty.
Nigel Tufnel: Yeah, I've been fooling around with it for a few months.
Marty DiBergi: It's a bit of a departure from what you normally play.
Nigel Tufnel: It's part of a trilogy, a musical trilogy I'm working on in D minor which is the saddest of all keys, I find. People weep instantly when they hear it, and I don't know why.
Marty DiBergi: It's very nice.
Nigel Tufnel: You know, just simple lines intertwining, you know, very much like - I'm really influenced by Mozart and Bach, and it's sort of in between those, really. It's like a Mach piece, really. It's sort of...
Marty DiBergi: What do you call this?
Nigel Tufnel: Well, this piece is called "Lick My Love Pump".
And then all the way up to 11.
Marty DiBergi: David St. Hubbins... I must admit I've never heard anybody with that name.
David St. Hubbins: It's an unusual name, well, he was an unusual saint, he's not a very well known saint.
Marty DiBergi: Oh, there actually is, uh... there was a Saint Hubbins?
David St. Hubbins: That's right, yes.
Marty DiBergi: What was he the saint of?
David St. Hubbins: He was the patron saint of quality footwear.
Can't have too many of those.
Ian Faith: Nigel gave me a drawing that said 18 inches. Now, whether or not he knows the difference between feet and inches is not my problem. I do what I'm told.
David St. Hubbins: But you're not as confused as him are you. I mean, it's not your job to be as confused as Nigel.
Actually, the drawing said 11 inches.
Marty DiBergi: Let's talk about your reviews a little bit. Regarding Intravenus de Milo - "This tasteless cover is a good indication of the lack of musical invention within. The musical growth rate of this band cannot even be charted. They are treading water in a sea of retarded sexuality and bad poetry."
Nigel Tufnel: That's...that's nitpicking, isn't it?
Next up: nitpicking here.
Bobbi Flekman: You put a greased naked woman on all fours with a dog collar around her neck, and a leash, and a man's arm extended out up to here, holding onto the leash, and pushing a black glove in her face to sniff it. You don't find that offensive? You don't find that sexist?
Ian Faith: This is 1982, Bobbi, c'mon!
Bobbi Flekman: That's right, it's 1982! Get out of the '60s. We don't have this mentality anymore.
Ian Faith: Well, you should have seen the cover they wanted to do! It wasn't a glove, believe me.
I wonder what it was.
Nigel Tufnel: The numbers all go to eleven. Look, right across the board, eleven, eleven, eleven and...
Marty DiBergi: Oh, I see. And most amps go up to ten?
Nigel Tufnel: Exactly.
Marty DiBergi: Does that mean it's louder? Is it any louder?
Nigel Tufnel: Well, it's one louder, isn't it? It's not ten. You see, most blokes, you know, will be playing at ten. You're on ten here, all the way up, all the way up, all the way up, you're on ten on your guitar. Where can you go from there? Where?
Marty DiBergi: I don't know.
Nigel Tufnel: Nowhere. Exactly. What we do is, if we need that extra push over the cliff, you know what we do?
Marty DiBergi: Put it up to eleven.
Nigel Tufnel: Eleven. Exactly. One louder.
Marty DiBergi: Why don't you just make ten louder and make ten be the top number and make that a little louder?
Nigel Tufnel: [pause] These go to eleven.
Reminds me of this: https://youtu.be/9y5K3KsuQ_M?si=v-u7Qw5IK_6J9POI
[Nigel is playing a soft piece on the piano]
Marty DiBergi: It's very pretty.
Nigel Tufnel: Yeah, I've been fooling around with it for a few months.
Marty DiBergi: It's a bit of a departure from what you normally play.
Nigel Tufnel: It's part of a trilogy, a musical trilogy I'm working on in D minor which is the saddest of all keys, I find. People weep instantly when they hear it, and I don't know why.
Marty DiBergi: It's very nice.
Nigel Tufnel: You know, just simple lines intertwining, you know, very much like - I'm really influenced by Mozart and Bach, and it's sort of in between those, really. It's like a Mach piece, really. It's sort of...
Marty DiBergi: What do you call this?
Nigel Tufnel: Well, this piece is called "Lick My Love Pump".
And then all the way up to 11.
Marty DiBergi: David St. Hubbins... I must admit I've never heard anybody with that name.
David St. Hubbins: It's an unusual name, well, he was an unusual saint, he's not a very well known saint.
Marty DiBergi: Oh, there actually is, uh... there was a Saint Hubbins?
David St. Hubbins: That's right, yes.
Marty DiBergi: What was he the saint of?
David St. Hubbins: He was the patron saint of quality footwear.
Can't have too many of those.
Ian Faith: Nigel gave me a drawing that said 18 inches. Now, whether or not he knows the difference between feet and inches is not my problem. I do what I'm told.
David St. Hubbins: But you're not as confused as him are you. I mean, it's not your job to be as confused as Nigel.
Actually, the drawing said 11 inches.
Marty DiBergi: Let's talk about your reviews a little bit. Regarding Intravenus de Milo - "This tasteless cover is a good indication of the lack of musical invention within. The musical growth rate of this band cannot even be charted. They are treading water in a sea of retarded sexuality and bad poetry."
Nigel Tufnel: That's...that's nitpicking, isn't it?
Next up: nitpicking here.
Bobbi Flekman: You put a greased naked woman on all fours with a dog collar around her neck, and a leash, and a man's arm extended out up to here, holding onto the leash, and pushing a black glove in her face to sniff it. You don't find that offensive? You don't find that sexist?
Ian Faith: This is 1982, Bobbi, c'mon!
Bobbi Flekman: That's right, it's 1982! Get out of the '60s. We don't have this mentality anymore.
Ian Faith: Well, you should have seen the cover they wanted to do! It wasn't a glove, believe me.
I wonder what it was.
-
iambiguous
- Posts: 7750
- Joined: Mon Nov 22, 2010 10:23 pm
Re: Quote of the day
Madness
“…madness is not hysteria. It can be very quiet…” Anne Sexton
Skulking around as it were.
“Magnus hoped if he ever went mad like that himself, so mad that he poisoned the very air round him and hurt everyone he came into contact with, that there would be someone who loved him enough to stop him. To kill him, if it came to that.” Cassandra Clare
Including the mad bastards here?
“Lots of people go mad in January. Not as many as in May, of course. Nor June. But January is your third most common month for madness.” Karen Joy Fowler
Unless, of course, you're from down under. Then it's the other way around.
“Julian spoke with the clear, unequivocal lucidity of madmen who have escaped the hypocrisy of having to abide by a reality that makes no sense.” Carlos Ruiz Zafón
Not much that doesn't include.
“The only performance that makes it, that makes it all the way is the one that achieves madness.” Mick Jagger
Let's run that by Don McLean.
“A man speaking sense to himself is no madder than a man speaking nonsense not to himself.” Tom Stoppard
Let's just say you can take that too far.
“…madness is not hysteria. It can be very quiet…” Anne Sexton
Skulking around as it were.
“Magnus hoped if he ever went mad like that himself, so mad that he poisoned the very air round him and hurt everyone he came into contact with, that there would be someone who loved him enough to stop him. To kill him, if it came to that.” Cassandra Clare
Including the mad bastards here?
“Lots of people go mad in January. Not as many as in May, of course. Nor June. But January is your third most common month for madness.” Karen Joy Fowler
Unless, of course, you're from down under. Then it's the other way around.
“Julian spoke with the clear, unequivocal lucidity of madmen who have escaped the hypocrisy of having to abide by a reality that makes no sense.” Carlos Ruiz Zafón
Not much that doesn't include.
“The only performance that makes it, that makes it all the way is the one that achieves madness.” Mick Jagger
Let's run that by Don McLean.
“A man speaking sense to himself is no madder than a man speaking nonsense not to himself.” Tom Stoppard
Let's just say you can take that too far.