Be good to yourself
-
- Posts: 1629
- Joined: Sat Mar 28, 2015 12:50 pm
Be good to yourself
Who is the harshest judge on your behaviour - reflecting on past experience; actions and consequences?
Your self ?
What good does it do, this self-analysis, if it brings you down ?
There are plenty others out there who judge and label you without knowing all the facts and circumstances.
Do we accept that this will always be the case. And how do we train the mind to be kind to self, becalm its tortured and tortuous thoughts or imaginings...
Are certain philosophies better or worse than others at 'self kindness' ?
Which philosophy has been 'good for you' - and can you explain what, where and how it was of benefit ? Also, how much of it has become your core way of living, and would not change...even if some 'costs' are involved ?
What about the philosophy of chocolate
Or Winnie the Pooh
Your self ?
What good does it do, this self-analysis, if it brings you down ?
There are plenty others out there who judge and label you without knowing all the facts and circumstances.
Do we accept that this will always be the case. And how do we train the mind to be kind to self, becalm its tortured and tortuous thoughts or imaginings...
Are certain philosophies better or worse than others at 'self kindness' ?
Which philosophy has been 'good for you' - and can you explain what, where and how it was of benefit ? Also, how much of it has become your core way of living, and would not change...even if some 'costs' are involved ?
What about the philosophy of chocolate
Or Winnie the Pooh
Re: Be good to yourself
It depends on the person. Some people never think about the pastand don't take responsability or analyze their own behaviour. Other people do it all the time. That's deep, part of personality, mostly built when you were a child, because of your experiences and how you are, difficult to change.marjoram_blues wrote:Who is the harshest judge on your behaviour - reflecting on past experience; actions and consequences?
Your self ?
It brings change. You won't do the same mistakes or so many mistakes if you analyze your behaviour.What good does it do, this self-analysis, if it brings you down ?
Everybody. We label people the same way we label stones, it's usefull to make a distinction between one rock and another. There are similarities between humans and we learn from experience. There is not an easy answer, sometimes the external judge is better, sometimes it's not.There are plenty others out there who judge and label you without knowing all the facts and circumstances
I don't know the meaning of "be kinf to self", you won't probably see yourself divided in a part that is kind to another part of yourself if you analyze etc, you'll see yourself as a whole.Do we accept that this will always be the case. And how do we train the mind to be kind to self, becalm its tortured and tortuous thoughts or imaginings...
There are masters of reality evasion and they don't look at their own mistakes. Every mistake I've done, even when they were extremely painfull, they were at the same time beautidull when I discovered it, because the suffering were fair and doing it better that wouldn't have happened. Better blame yourself than the Universe, better think it is your fault, than thinking that you can't change anything.Are certain philosophies better or worse than others at 'self kindness' ?
You are asking about a person wholes mind, psichology, and philosophy, their deeper insides, in two lines. Every anwer ot the same lenght is going to be useless, and we are not equal, would you show your insides here? I mean, all that "moments" in your life, some of them precious, other horrific, and how did they changed your mind?Which philosophy has been 'good for you' - and can you explain what, where and how it was of benefit ? Also, how much of it has become your core way of living, and would not change...even if some 'costs' are involved ?
I like chocolate.What about the philosophy of chocolate
Re: Be good to yourself
I don't think anybody does.TSBU wrote: I don't know the meaning of "be kinf to self",
-
- Posts: 1629
- Joined: Sat Mar 28, 2015 12:50 pm
Re: Be good to yourself
You are a kinf soul, herbalHarbal wrote:I don't think anybody does.TSBU wrote: I don't know the meaning of "be kinf to self",
Re: Be good to yourself
It's very kinf of you to say so, marjoram, thank you.marjoram_blues wrote: You are a kinf soul, herbal
-
- Posts: 1629
- Joined: Sat Mar 28, 2015 12:50 pm
Re: Be good to yourself
TSBU
Thanks for your reply.
The 'be good to yourself' part is meant on a simple level. It is what some people say when they wish to counsel or help alleviate any burden you are hauling around. Basically, you need to look after yourself before you can be of any use to others. Also, give yourself a break or a treat, like chocolate.
And about asking others about their philosophy of life and how they cope, it's no biggie, is it ?
It might help to see the relevance, or otherwise, of philosophy...
Either way, it is often clear by what, where and how people write where their priorities and core values lie. But then again - there are certain wee devils out there who take a lot of flak for taking and showing an opposite viewpoint from their own. I would not expect anyone - or myself- to be able to, or want to, talk about all of their deepest experiences...
That is too personal and revealing to be placed all in one thread - the tendency is to show our thoughts a little at a time, depending on how we feel or trust issues.
There is no harm in asking - people can give as little or as much as they like...
Thanks for your reply.
The 'be good to yourself' part is meant on a simple level. It is what some people say when they wish to counsel or help alleviate any burden you are hauling around. Basically, you need to look after yourself before you can be of any use to others. Also, give yourself a break or a treat, like chocolate.
And about asking others about their philosophy of life and how they cope, it's no biggie, is it ?
It might help to see the relevance, or otherwise, of philosophy...
Either way, it is often clear by what, where and how people write where their priorities and core values lie. But then again - there are certain wee devils out there who take a lot of flak for taking and showing an opposite viewpoint from their own. I would not expect anyone - or myself- to be able to, or want to, talk about all of their deepest experiences...
That is too personal and revealing to be placed all in one thread - the tendency is to show our thoughts a little at a time, depending on how we feel or trust issues.
There is no harm in asking - people can give as little or as much as they like...
Re: Be good to yourself
There is a shampoo in my country, probably in yours too, "herbal esences", the adds had a woman shouting in the shower like an orgasm. I see future between you two XD.Harbal wrote:It's very kinf of you to say so, marjoram, thank you.marjoram_blues wrote: You are a kinf soul, herbal
Re: Be good to yourself
What has that advert got to do with anything?TSBU wrote: There is a shampoo in my country, probably in yours too, "herbal esences", the adds had a woman shouting in the shower like an orgasm. I see future between you two XD.
Re: Be good to yourself
She said "herbal" not "harbal", just like I said "kinf" instead of "kind". The only place I've seen the word herbal is in that advert and I wanted to give you back the joke.Harbal wrote:What has that advert got to do with anything?TSBU wrote: There is a shampoo in my country, probably in yours too, "herbal esences", the adds had a woman shouting in the shower like an orgasm. I see future between you two XD.
Re: Be good to yourself
So she did, I didn't spot that, STUB, thanks for pointing it out.TSBU wrote: She said "herbal" not "harbal",
-
- Posts: 4922
- Joined: Tue Apr 14, 2015 4:48 am
- Location: Living in a tree with Polly.
Re: Be good to yourself
Did I ever tell you that I pray to the great god, Calgon, to take me away?TSBU wrote:She said "herbal" not "harbal", just like I said "kinf" instead of "kind". The only place I've seen the word herbal is in that advert and I wanted to give you back the joke.Harbal wrote:What has that advert got to do with anything?TSBU wrote: There is a shampoo in my country, probably in yours too, "herbal esences", the adds had a woman shouting in the shower like an orgasm. I see future between you two XD.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Calgon# ... away.21.22
Re: Be good to yourself
If we are good to ourselves we do not judge ourselves too severly.
But how much is too much ?
If I feel like a cockroach (at times) is it because the instinct of self-preservation has forced me to become one ? Difficult to say.
On the other hand there is the danger of narcissism. Which is a huge impediment to personal development.
My approach is this: instead of making a judgement that I am good enough or a loser I simply try new things out and my intuition should tell me whether I am moving in the right direction or not.
Harsh judgement of oneself puts one in a state of inertia and despair. This cannot be good for anyone.
A moment of bitter repentence if one had done something very wrong that cannot be reversed (Raskolnikov murdering an old lady and the like) is necessary. It should make us move in a better direction from then on.
Bodily pleasures are easy to celebrate. Chocolate seems to weaken my immune system but strong black tea accompanied by natural joghurt accompanied by organic honey ... hmmmm !
Mens sana in corpore sano.
If we put our body in good shape we are ready for good actions.
But how much is too much ?
If I feel like a cockroach (at times) is it because the instinct of self-preservation has forced me to become one ? Difficult to say.
On the other hand there is the danger of narcissism. Which is a huge impediment to personal development.
My approach is this: instead of making a judgement that I am good enough or a loser I simply try new things out and my intuition should tell me whether I am moving in the right direction or not.
Harsh judgement of oneself puts one in a state of inertia and despair. This cannot be good for anyone.
A moment of bitter repentence if one had done something very wrong that cannot be reversed (Raskolnikov murdering an old lady and the like) is necessary. It should make us move in a better direction from then on.
Bodily pleasures are easy to celebrate. Chocolate seems to weaken my immune system but strong black tea accompanied by natural joghurt accompanied by organic honey ... hmmmm !
Mens sana in corpore sano.
If we put our body in good shape we are ready for good actions.
Re: Be good to yourself
I can't see sense in that.duszek wrote:If we are good to ourselves we do not judge ourselves too severly.
Or what is severely... You can judge yourself severely and be happy, all you have to do is judge and act the best way, the fair way, seeing what you deserve.But how much is too much ?
Nothing has forced you to be a cockroach, that's easy to say.If I feel like a cockroach (at times) is it because the instinct of self-preservation has forced me to become one ? Difficult to say.
Define well narcisism and "personal development".On the other hand there is the danger of narcissism. Which is a huge impediment to personal development.
Everybody seems to see everything like "being a loser or a winer", nobody is the best for everything. And intuition is certeanly not enough, and it's difficult to define too.My approach is this: instead of making a judgement that I am good enough or a loser I simply try new things out and my intuition should tell me whether I am moving in the right direction or not.
You talk about feelings like if you could controll what you feel, you can only control what you think, and then that will result in feelings when the situation comes, but thinking in feelings alone is absurd, it's like thinking in murdering and controll how much guilt you must feel before doing it. Nobody teach us to feel things, you just take responsability and you feel what you feel when you fail or you success, and that makes you reoirganize your mind.Harsh judgement of oneself puts one in a state of inertia and despair. This cannot be good for anyone.
A moment of bitter repentence if one had done something very wrong that cannot be reversed (Raskolnikov murdering an old lady and the like) is necessary. It should make us move in a better direction from then on.
What are non natural joghurt or honey? that things are always made with milk and... hell, honey, I have bees, that's cheap XD. Yeah, yeah, that's ok, but the "enjoy the little things" sounds always conformist. Chocolate and honey will keep being a pleasure anyway, let's hope diabetes don't come.Bodily pleasures are easy to celebrate. Chocolate seems to weaken my immune system but strong black tea accompanied by natural joghurt accompanied by organic honey ... hmmmm !
Nothing is a better prof or a "corpore sano" than being all the day eating chocolate and honey XD. I think people in hopsital can have as good mental health as the rest :/.Mens sana in corpore sano.
Ehm... no. It only makes you ready for body actions.If we put our body in good shape we are ready for good actions.
Re: Be good to yourself
Replies to TSBU:
1. yoghurt, honey and lots of other foods can be made less natural by processing them or adding preservatives, colors and other harmful substances (processed foods)
2. if you try to survive among bullies and sneaky moles you have to become like them, otherwise you are a doomed idiot
3. an example of judging oneself severely:
I wanted to clean the apartment and to be nice to a person who gets on my nerves although it is not her intention but I was under the weather and did not manage to do either,
shall I feel remorse because I did not try hard enough ?
or shall I forgive myself, relax, and try to do better next day ?
It´s the readiness to find excuses and justifications for a failure that makes a judgment more or less severe.
1. yoghurt, honey and lots of other foods can be made less natural by processing them or adding preservatives, colors and other harmful substances (processed foods)
2. if you try to survive among bullies and sneaky moles you have to become like them, otherwise you are a doomed idiot
3. an example of judging oneself severely:
I wanted to clean the apartment and to be nice to a person who gets on my nerves although it is not her intention but I was under the weather and did not manage to do either,
shall I feel remorse because I did not try hard enough ?
or shall I forgive myself, relax, and try to do better next day ?
It´s the readiness to find excuses and justifications for a failure that makes a judgment more or less severe.
Re: Be good to yourself
Honey doesn't need preserva... in Spanish "preservativo" means condom. Anyway, it doesn't get old, or not easily, I think I've heard that honey from ancient Egipt has been found in good state to eat.duszek wrote: 1. yoghurt, honey and lots of other foods can be made less natural by processing them or adding preservatives, colors and other harmful substances (processed foods)
With Joghurt, it's the oposite. It always have preservatives, and more things. And, of course, and thanfuly, every milk product is processed, (boiled) before giving it to humans. And... we cook almost everything.
If you think like that, you are a doomed idiot. Fighting for self defence is not becoming a bullie or a... sneaky mole XD (funny English again XD).2. if you try to survive among bullies and sneaky moles you have to become like them, otherwise you are a doomed idiot
As I said, thinking in feeling or not feeling things is absurd, you can''t controll that, you must controll your thoughts about what that person deserves. Evidently, if that person always get on your nerves, the first thing should probably be to talk with that person about the reasons and how to change them if it is possible, or how to avoid that situations if it isn't possible (maybe by being more rude with that person, I don't know), what is that person intention is important, but it's not the only important thing, and, if that person really have a "no harm intention", then that person should try, like you.3. an example of judging oneself severely:
I wanted to clean the apartment and to be nice to a person who gets on my nerves although it is not her intention but I was under the weather and did not manage to do either,
shall I feel remorse because I did not try hard enough ?
or shall I forgive myself, relax, and try to do better next day ?
I don't understand what is "forgive" (in my language the same word exists and I don't understand it either, that means that I don't see sense in it).
For me, a severe judgement is like a severe study, you just have to take more time and analyze more things, that's "more severe". And less severe is "less thinking".It´s the readiness to find excuses and justifications for a failure that makes a judgment more or less severe.