disciplining children

[The Voice of Time]

Do you know the meaning of any word, or do you always supply your own?

I look up words I've not been exposed to or very little exposed to. Some words I work by what I have been exposed to, and other words I don't feel are used well by some people who use it, so I correct them.

In terms of words like "violence", every person wants to use it exactly the way it fits them, because it's a negative word. If you're a child abuser, you won't to raise the bar for being called "violent" with your actions against your kids, if you're a soldier, you don't want people to use the word "violence" about your acts but instead emphasize necessities and legitimacy in the hope that they forget all the horrors that it all implies, if you're a rapist, you might want to emphasize how you didn't "hit" your victim but only held them firmly against their will, or that your threats against them didn't cause them physical injury.

The more you try to move away from the word "violence" Spheres of Balance, without showing regret for what you did, the more necessity there is in me reminding you that it is an act of "violence", that, from what you write, I take it you intended to hurt (make it feel pain, damage its mind for a time) the child so that its will would be bent towards what you desired of it. Unless you can tell me that it's not what you did, or that you did it but regret it, then I have nothing else to say than that you are fucked up Spheres of Balance, and that it's highly regrettable that you perpetuate violence in children's lives, or anyone's life for that sake (I certainly regret every time in my life I've been violent, and some of the times, whatever small the acts or consequences may seem for me, they still haunt me, and I wish I could undo it).

If you did "play" with your kid, you should say so, then we're likely talking about an accident, but up until that time, talking about animals playing is a preposterous comparison, try playing with your kid and slash it with your nails or bite it painfully or hit it or slam it to the ground and keep it there against its will, try that with a little child, and we'll see if the child enjoys it or whether it will scream in pain and/or fear and/or agony.

[Arising_uk]

... some rant that I've not bothered to finish reading ...

It's not all about you, you paranoid nutjob.

[Kayla]

It is entirely different babysitting, you can leave them and go home after a couple of hours.

With your own child it is a 24 hour responsibility.

I do not doubt Sphere's sincerity.

i dont doubt it although i doubt his mental stability

a couple of hours?

try accompanying young children (note the plural) through a trip that includes a transfer in atlanta, delayed flights and lost luggage as well as an overnight stay at an airport hotel

at no point did i raise my voice or any signs of frustration - one of the children actually commented that most grownups totally freak out in cases like this


but in any case the whole 'well i have been a parent for three hundred years and have fifty children' argument is crap

people with all sorts of views - including mutually exclusive ones - concerning raising of children can make it


i have seen nothing to suggest that people who have raised lots of children are any better as parents that people who just got their first one

[Kayla]

And you fuckers think yourself intelligent? Are you fucking kidding me?

i can see how you would be very good at teaching children self control and respect for others

MY university and EVERY OTHER school I EVER went to said that if you're READING, and come to a word your DON"T UNDERSTAND, "DO NOT" continue reading as the meaning THAT FOLLOWS has the potential of being LOST on you, INSTEAD, IMMEDIATELY, look the word up in a DICTIONARY, then proceed.

i think you are confusing 'university' and school with the incoherent ramblings of l. ron hubbard

[Kayla]

i just remembered an episode from my childhood relevant to the discussion we are having

i read my big brothers 'intro to child psychology' textbook when i was a child myself

the parenting approach it implicitly advocated tended strongly on the 'liberal' side and did not always fit my parents' approach to raising kids - my parents being texan republicans and all

at one point i actually told them that some of the things they were doing went against what i read in the textbook

they dismissed that by saying that the authors of the book do not have any children of their own so they have no business telling anyone how to raise kids

i looked up the biographical information about the contributors to the book - which was conviniently in the book itself - and all of them had children

i pointed out the error to my parents - so there was no tv for me for the rest of the week

this of course brought about one of my famous meltdowns

at least my father was intelligent enough to realize that at that point a good asswhooping - which some relatives suggested as a way of dealing with my frequent fits of temperament - would do fuck all


but my main point is that the whole 'i have kids i know what i am talking about' thing is crap

[reasonvemotion]

I don't know whether I want to throw up or laugh, such fucking stupidity.

Kayla wrote:

at no point did i raise my voice or any signs of frustration - one of the children actually commented that most grownups totally freak out in cases like this

Held up at an airport, Jesus if that is all you have to bitch about, then I will laugh


Kayla wrote:

this of course brought about one of my famous meltdowns

The kids have lots to look forward to, just make sure that social worker is not lurking, when you decide to have one.

Whose fucking kids have you got? You never did clarify that.


Do you get money from the government for this?


You are just a kid and it shows, (albeit a shrewd one).

[The Voice of Time]

If it's a advice one needs it's usually readily available from and by everyone. Therefore, it's not really age that makes the big difference (though of course you should be an adults with a couple of years at least in the experience of being an adult, otherwise you should share responsibility with your parents or another family to compensate in the situation), a modest amount of intelligence or a good community can do the trick to leverage the situation, and otherwise all one need is a good heart and no great deviations in your knowledge about life compared to other modestly competent people of ones age.

And of course the more obvious things like income, a relatively healthy life-style (that is, healthy for the kid, like no substance abuse, alcohol abuse or proneness for illegalities) and the like are less age dependent, but also needs to be sorted out.

My foster sister had a baby now and she's like 20 years old (one year less than me), she's modestly intelligent and is good at social relations, a great singer among things (competed in the nationals), has a great social network for which she has acquired by among things participating a lot in politics. I have great faith in her motherly capabilities, and believe she'll do a great job. She has patience, she's thoughtful, she's active, she's caring and she's loving, pretty much born to be a strong mother (and she has a tender heart).

[Kayla]

Held up at an airport, Jesus if that is all you have to bitch about, then I will laugh

have you ever been held up at an airport with lost luggage and a whiny kid or two

i have seen men better than you have total meltdowns over that

The kids have lots to look forward to, just make sure that social worker is not lurking, when you decide to have one.

never had one in the presence of a child, let alone directed at a child

getting angry at children is something i never understood

i am pretty much over the meltdowns anyway

Whose fucking kids have you got? You never did clarify that.

no i did not there is no need

[reasonvemotion]

Kayla wrote:

have you ever been held up at an airport with lost luggage and a whiny kid or two

i have seen men better than you have total meltdowns over that

I think you are exaggerating the scenario and creating a calamity of huge proportions from a moderate problem.

You appear to live in a world which mentally departs from reality.

[SpheresOfBalance]

Do you know the meaning of any word, or do you always supply your own?

I look up words I've not been exposed to or very little exposed to. Some words I work by what I have been exposed to, and other words I don't feel are used well by some people who use it, so I correct them.

In terms of words like "violence", every person wants to use it exactly the way it fits them, because it's a negative word. If you're a child abuser, you won't to raise the bar for being called "violent" with your actions against your kids, if you're a soldier, you don't want people to use the word "violence" about your acts but instead emphasize necessities and legitimacy in the hope that they forget all the horrors that it all implies, if you're a rapist, you might want to emphasize how you didn't "hit" your victim but only held them firmly against their will, or that your threats against them didn't cause them physical injury.
And one that experienced some disciplinary action at the hands of their mother that they object too, call it violence, so as to make it as bad as they can, so as to have a reason for dealing retribution, they also often carry a torch for violence, seeing it in every shadow, whether it exists or not! Much like the boy who cried wolf


The more you try to move away from the word "violence" Spheres of Balance, without showing regret for what you did,
Son, you don't know what I did, because you weren't there, but seemingly too stupid to understand this fact!!!!

the more necessity there is in me reminding you that it is an act of "violence", that, from what you write, I take it you intended to hurt (make it feel pain, damage its mind for a time) the child so that its will would be bent towards what you desired of it.
All in your mind, a reflection and projection of you and your mothers drama.

Unless you can tell me that it's not what you did, or that you did it but regret it,
I owe you nothing, as I have not falsely characterized your and your mothers problems, like you've done me. You owe me and my son an apology, or should shut the fuck up, as you know not of what you speak!


then I have nothing else to say than that you are fucked up Spheres of Balance,
Think whatever you want, as I KNOW that you are fucked up, as you TELL someone what it is that they have done without being there, so as to know, as if that's humanly possible. You have tread on me and my son, because of the projection of your relationship with your mother onto us. You should be ashamed of yourself, the little ill informed boy that you are, making others accountable for your personal problems, that you see everywhere that you look.

and that it's highly regrettable that you perpetuate violence in children's lives,
could you be any more deluded, living in your fantasy of projection?

or anyone's life for that sake (I certainly regret every time in my life I've been violent, and some of the times, whatever small the acts or consequences may seem for me, they still haunt me, and I wish I could undo it).
Nothing new here, it's a common human response, and I feel for you, yet I have not projected upon you, the meaning of your words as to your mothers and your relationship, as that is only for you and your mother to do.


If you did "play" with your kid, you should say so, then we're likely talking about an accident, but up until that time, talking about animals playing is a preposterous comparison, try playing with your kid and slash it with your nails or bite it painfully or hit it or slam it to the ground and keep it there against its will, try that with a little child, and we'll see if the child enjoys it or whether it will scream in pain and/or fear and/or agony.
You as a youngster yourself, obviously have no clue as to my meaning, as my life is so far ahead of yours. I have seen so much more than you have, not that you won't one day get there when you're my age. But make no mistake, you are now my hardcore enemy, because you TOLD me what my and my sons relationship was/is, as if that's humanly possible. You weren't even born when it happened, still one of your mothers ovum's, I seriously doubt that you somehow had consciousness as an ovum, being capable of consciousness projection so as to witness what actually happened. You have tread upon me and my son, which is UNFORGIVABLE. You have taken my words, gave them your meaning, without so much as to question their accuracy of conveyance, and created a fiasco, holding me accountable for your DELUSIONS of PROJECTION of you and you mothers relationship. YOU OWE US APOLOGY, OR YOU CAN GO TO HELL, AS THIS IS MORE OF YOUR VIOLENCE, THAT YOU SEE EVERYWHERE, BECAUSE YOU WERE TREATED BADLY! AND I WON"T STAND FOR IT, BOY! YOU MESS WITH MY FAMILY AND I'LL FOLLOW YOU TO THE ENDS OF TIME, SPREADING THE SAME TYPES OF LIES ABOUT YOU THAT YOU HAVE CONCOCTED ABOUT US. HEY, EYE FOR AND EYE, TOOTH FOR A TOOTH!!!! YOU SHOULDN'T DEAL IT, IF YOU CAN'T TAKE IT!

Your persistence at offending the innocent is what's pissing me off! There's no enemy like an innocent enemy!!!! And you're guilty as sin, boy! You're the biggest brat I've seen in here yet, yelling to AMOD and IMOD to delete someones message because you're too young and inexperienced to see that what the other is saying IS on topic, got to have it your way, little BRAT, or you yell for you mommy and daddy to make it go away. Can't stand up on you own two feet, you 21 year old baby, got to call for reinforcement, when it's unwarranted, just so you can have things your way. If you say someone is VIOLENT, well by GOD they certainly must be, BECAUSE YOU SAID SO! No benefit of doubt coming from your 21 year old mind, no way, because you're a spoiled brat, that knows every god damn thing whether you witnessed it empirically or not!

Go to hell little boy, you're effectively on my shit list, of no account babblers, the LIAR that you have made yourself out to be! You have NOTHING but my Ill understood words as your witness, what windmills, you are fighting, the ferocious giants are only to be found in your mind!!!

GO FUCK YOURSELF, UNTIL YOU GROW UP!!!

[SpheresOfBalance]

... some rant that I've not bothered to finish reading ...
Because you're too stupid, the ego blower that you are!

It's not all about you, you paranoid nutjob.

Mind your own business, you fucking lightweight CüNT!

[SpheresOfBalance]

And you fuckers think yourself intelligent? Are you fucking kidding me?

i can see how you would be very good at teaching children self control and respect for others
Who tread on who first??? It would seem you don't know how to keep score. Also for those, of tender years, you must consider yourself one of them, as I was only speaking to those to which it applied, you included yourself, not I.

MY university and EVERY OTHER school I EVER went to said that if you're READING, and come to a word your DON"T UNDERSTAND, "DO NOT" continue reading as the meaning THAT FOLLOWS has the potential of being LOST on you, INSTEAD, IMMEDIATELY, look the word up in a DICTIONARY, then proceed.

i think you are confusing 'university' and school with the incoherent ramblings of l. ron hubbard
What the hell does he got to do with anything?

[Arising_uk]

Mind your own business, ...

I was until you decided to quote me atop your rant you megalomaniacal fruitloop.

[The Voice of Time]

I never told you what you did Spheres of Balance, you did that yourself, I merely say what it means, and it means violence. I'm quite apathetic to people angry towards me, SoB, your rant is not felt.

I can't remember to have called you violent, SoB, unless you really are, that'd be a mistake, but you were, when you committed violence against your kid, that doesn't mean you have a habit for it or have done it many times. That one time is sad though, it's beneath dignity, however "light" it was, as long as your kid felt pain, and it was your intention, I see no reason why it shouldn't be called violence, no reason what-so-ever.

[SpheresOfBalance]

Mind your own business, ...

I was until you decided to quote me atop your rant you megalomaniacal fruitloop.

You're sooo two faced, or is it your mind slipping, you pompous, arrogant FREAK! Mrs. "here's my license to be nasty, see it says so," Mrs Asinking_uk.