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Re: Got any good jokes?
Posted: Tue Apr 26, 2022 5:07 pm
by Walker
American humour
“85% of you have to go.”
Bill Burr Tackles The Population Problem
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a9WowBxdhTQ
Re: Got any good jokes?
Posted: Wed Apr 27, 2022 3:55 pm
by Walker
"85% of you have to go."
The US population is about 5%.
Who gets a piece of the other 10%?
Re: Got any good jokes?
Posted: Tue May 03, 2022 10:54 am
by Dontaskme
Re: Got any good jokes?
Posted: Fri May 06, 2022 11:58 pm
by promethean75
The funniest, wittiest commercials are always the auto insurance commercials. Geico's are always very clever. Progressive has its moments. Farmers just realeased a funny one:
https://youtu.be/wFiPl96pCus
I'm a critical analyzer and analytical critic of commercial advertising. Especially TV commercials. I analyze the fuck out of em and find all kinds of sneaky shit. Prescription drug commercials are the worst. Notice how after the actor begins the prescription for the medication, there's bright colors everywhere and at least three people in the social group are wearing yellow and smiling too much? There's a reason for that. They're subliminally triggering reward centers in the brain through thematic visual stimulation.
Re: Got any good jokes?
Posted: Sat May 07, 2022 11:52 pm
by attofishpi
I'm sure of that, kinky though it might be, most people I know would frown at a log being in a bathroom.
Re: Got any good jokes?
Posted: Sat May 07, 2022 11:55 pm
by attofishpi
promethean75 wrote: ↑Fri May 06, 2022 11:58 pm
The funniest, wittiest commercials are always the auto insurance commercials. Geico's are always very clever. Progressive has its moments. Farmers just realeased a funny one:
https://youtu.be/wFiPl96pCus
I'm a critical analyzer and analytical critic of commercial advertising. Especially TV commercials. I analyze the fuck out of em and find all kinds of sneaky shit. Prescription drug commercials are the worst. Notice how after the actor begins the prescription for the medication, there's bright colors everywhere and at least three people in the social group are wearing yellow and smiling too much? There's a reason for that. They're subliminally triggering reward centers in the brain through thematic visual stimulation.
Why do life insurance commercials ALWAYS have people hugging a cup of tea (or coffee - I don't have one of those scratch and sniff TVs yet). I understand it makes more sense than if they zoomed into my lounge room with a shot of me hugging a bottle of single malt.
Carling black label beer adverts were my favs in the 80s.
Rip off of Levis advert:-
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=oCemJAd3KZA
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=5hx4tK0ylLc
Re: Got any good jokes?
Posted: Sun May 08, 2022 6:35 am
by Dontaskme
attofishpi wrote: ↑Sat May 07, 2022 11:52 pm
I'm sure of that, kinky though it might be, most people I know would frown at a log being in a bathroom.
Re: Got any good jokes?
Posted: Mon May 09, 2022 9:46 pm
by Walker
Re: Got any good jokes?
Posted: Wed May 11, 2022 11:25 am
by Walker
With all due respect, what the hell where you thinking?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HaqSBJNESWQ
Literal answer one: The misspelling makes the joke more right.
Re: Got any good jokes?
Posted: Wed May 11, 2022 11:38 am
by Sculptor
A man walks into a red neck bar, and asks to see the food menu.
The waitress comes over with a small piece of paper:
Hot dogs $5
Burgers $10
Handjobs $20
He looks the waitress up and down and says;
" Are you the one giving out the Handjobs".
She smiles; "Yessir!!" In expectation.
"Great," he replies. "Wash yer hands, I want a burger."
Re: Got any good jokes?
Posted: Wed May 11, 2022 11:46 am
by Walker
That joke about appropriateness reminds me of another Norm joke I found.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2_0q_CXl41s
Re: Got any good jokes?
Posted: Wed May 11, 2022 11:59 am
by Walker
promethean75 wrote: ↑Fri May 06, 2022 11:58 pm
The funniest, wittiest commercials are always the auto insurance commercials. Geico's are always very clever. Progressive has its moments.
Do you think Maxwell is when they started to get really goofy? He may be the true demarcation into insurance zany. Geico was wise to retire Maxwell at the top of his game. He probably overshadowed the Geco campaign. Now he lives on in legend, and like Tiger, has the talent to return and he's probably still around. A pig like that, you don't eat all at once.
Big Lou, life insurance, has some funny ads on the radio.
"Big Lou's like you ..."
Re: Got any good jokes?
Posted: Wed May 11, 2022 8:40 pm
by SpheresOfBalance
attofishpi wrote: ↑Fri Apr 22, 2022 7:57 am
Ah..OK Mr cliche.
SpheresOfBollocks strikes again...and the crowd erupts with a big yawn..
You would say that, "Mr. figment of your imagination."
Re: Got any good jokes?
Posted: Thu May 12, 2022 2:36 am
by attofishpi
SpheresOfBollocks wrote: ↑Wed May 11, 2022 8:40 pm
attofishpi wrote: ↑Fri Apr 22, 2022 7:57 am
Ah..OK Mr cliche.
SpheresOfBollocks strikes again...and the crowd erupts with a big yawn..
You would say that, "Mr. figment of your imagination."
*yawn*
Here's a better one: Fuck off you stupid troll kunt.
How come you're back online anyway - i thought they banned homeless paedophiles from libraries.
Re: Got any good jokes?
Posted: Fri May 13, 2022 9:04 am
by Dontaskme
Sculptor wrote: ↑Wed May 11, 2022 11:38 am
A man walks into a red neck bar, and asks to see the food menu.
The waitress comes over with a small piece of paper:
Hot dogs $5
Burgers $10
Handjobs $20
He looks the waitress up and down and says;
" Are you the one giving out the Handjobs".
She smiles; "Yessir!!" In expectation.
"Great," he replies. "Wash yer hands, I want a burger."
