ethics of Surrogacy

[vegetariantaxidermy]

i can always count on my parents to help care for the baby in it's early years.

and Mom's basement? I don't believe a word of it.

That's right, a basement is no place to bring up a child.

[thedoc]

i can always count on my parents to help care for the baby in it's early years.

and Mom's basement? I don't believe a word of it.

That's right, a basement is no place to bring up a child.

That sounds a bit absolutist, and maybe a bit narrow minded. "My basement is damp, dirty, and not a good place to be in", so 'all basements are damp, dirty, and not a good place to be in'. Some people have houses with a finished basement that is used as the family room. My son's house has a finished family room in the basement, plus two other smaller finished rooms, one of which is being used as a bedroom for the older daughter. It would proably be safer to find out for sure before making sweeping statments that may not apply.

[Lynn]

That's right, a basement is no place to bring up a child.

That sounds a bit absolutist, and maybe a bit narrow minded. "My basement is damp, dirty, and not a good place to be in", so 'all basements are damp, dirty, and not a good place to be in'. Some people have houses with a finished basement that is used as the family room. My son's house has a finished family room in the basement, plus two other smaller finished rooms, one of which is being used as a bedroom for the older daughter. It would proably be safer to find out for sure before making sweeping statments that may not apply.

I also think it is subjective. In Glasgow and Edinburgh, there are many lovely and sought after basement flats by families, couples and singles alike e.g. http://www.capitala.co.uk/renovation-ba ... burgh.html, although as a student I usually ended up living in third or fourth floor flats, which would be more cumbersome especially for young families e.g. with children in prams.

[Outsider]

Is it ethical for a heterosexual man who wants children of his own to pay a woman to have a baby and then have her give up full custody?

I've always wanted children, and i've been lately having a strong fatherly instinct as a woman would have a motherly instinct. I personally understand being more happy single rather than a coupled life. I enjoy living by myself and keeping my own hours.I want a kid(preferably a boy), but I don’t want the stresses of a relationship and I don’t believe that precludes me from being a good father.Have you ever looked around our society and seen the high percentage of relationship failure and the traumatic effect this has on the child?Besides,I don't see any downsides in single fatherhood as opposed to single mothers.You hear this bullshit all the time about women being better providers ,protectors, and able to bond more effectively.why? because they’re female? Men are just as protective of their children. women drop off infants at public institutions all the time. This has very little to do with the parents gender and more to do with the individual .a man is held responsible for a child and mother and must support them regardless of the success of the relationship. Why risk loosing the relationship with your children? Women have no responsibility or cost in a failed relationship they are free to find another partner & will have no social stigmas and they will receive financial support from the father and the state.not to forget Child custody laws are heavily bias towards women these days.

I'm well aware of the staggering cost of surrogacy and i'm willing to pay the price.though costly, it's a relatively simple procedure. purchase the eggs ,use ivf for gender selection & pay a surrogate to have embryo implanted in her uterus.

In our society, we are more used to hearing about single mothers,but throughout the ages ,children, especially boys ,have been raised by their fathers. Most of western society don't seem to have issues when a single woman decides by choice to have a child without a father,and is often subsidized by the state. So why should it be any different if a man makes this decision?

discuss

Have you thought through what kind of people 'put their eggs for sale' in the first place?

And when your child is of age, what is it that you plan on telling him, if you plan on telling him? That he was conceived the way he was because his father couldn't be hassled by all the gender-stress, his father came to conclusions about females based on a generalized socio-cultural trend, his father was unwilling to show enough boldness to Hunt properly, his father did not have heart enough to deal with both the good&bad parts of a relationship and was someone who only wanted to enjoy the good parts, and quit on the messy parts, his father Purchased him with his money, with the least bit of hassle, a minor investment, like he were some toy in a shop? My own view is, what's the point of raising a boy-child if all you're going to teach him by Your Own Example of how You've Lived Your Life, is a lack of any spirituality or strength to meet the thousand challenges life is going to pose to your would-be son in the future? Are you going to let some feminists decide and dictate the over-ruling of any potential chance of a normal family you Might have? Is there any point in having a boy-child only to raise him to tell him being a man he can't do much and must resort to some technological solutions at the mercy of some samples who decide to donate their eggs? To have a child simply to fill my own Vacuum would be beneath My bar, but that's just my view again.

Unless you are in an age bracket that calls for desperate measures, I wouldn't go with this.

[thedoc]

It is also a common sterotype that artistic types favored the top floor, Garret, especially with a skylight and no heat. They could strave in the cold, but paint and write all they wanted. As in Puccini's La Boheme.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-4rsu11K ... re=related

Sorry, the Aria had nothing to do with the topic, I just like it.

[vegetariantaxidermy]

That's right, a basement is no place to bring up a child.

That sounds a bit absolutist, and maybe a bit narrow minded. "My basement is damp, dirty, and not a good place to be in", so 'all basements are damp, dirty, and not a good place to be in'. Some people have houses with a finished basement that is used as the family room. My son's house has a finished family room in the basement, plus two other smaller finished rooms, one of which is being used as a bedroom for the older daughter. It would proably be safer to find out for sure before making sweeping statments that may not apply.

I also think it is subjective. In Glasgow and Edinburgh, there are many lovely and sought after basement flats by families, couples and singles alike e.g. http://www.capitala.co.uk/renovation-ba ... burgh.html, although as a student I usually ended up living in third or fourth floor flats, which would be more cumbersome especially for young families e.g. with children in prams.

'Absolutist'?? OMG, it was a joke.

[thedoc]

'Absolutist'?? OMG, it was a joke.

I've never had much luck with humor on a forum either, but that doesn't stop me from trying.

But I hope you will excuse me, I have encountered people with a kind of 'absolutist' view on many things, hence my reaction.

[johngalthasspoken]

Outsider - Thanks for the reply.. i haven't made up my mind yet, so for now i'm keeping all options open..

[thedoc]

John, one point you should seriously keep in mind, TV and movies are not a good place to find ethical values and guidance for important decisions in life. Sometimes they get it right, but most of the time it's pure fantasy with no relation to reality.

[reasonvemotion]

Use your reasoning powers. Can you imagine John paying for a surrogate Indian mother, or any other place for that matter, when he emphatically stated Australia was a great place until they got rid of the "All white policy". He is full of shit and not to be taken seriously. But ultimately, I am only a woman. But, women know best, we use our intuitive abilities. He is one easy dude to read, pauvre garçon. and at this moment his head off.

i haven't made up my mind yet, so for now i'm keeping all options open..

If you hit rock bottom there is always Know Thyself, you may get lucky, plenty of desperates over "there"

[johngalthasspoken]

John, one point you should seriously keep in mind, TV and movies are not a good place to find ethical values and guidance for important decisions in life. Sometimes they get it right, but most of the time it's pure fantasy with no relation to reality.

It's become a multi-billion dollar business & it's growing fast.I don’t think a motherless child will be effected negatively at all.perhaps you don't know,it is a well documented fact that children raised by single dads do better in many areas of measurement in comparison to children raised by single moms. These measurements include academic progress, social competence, psychological health and physical health & so on. i really don't understand your hostility towards single fatherhood

[johngalthasspoken]

Use your reasoning powers. Can you imagine John paying for a surrogate Indian mother, or any other place for that matter, when he emphatically stated Australia was a great place until they got rid of the "All white policy". He is full of shit and not to be taken seriously.

don't see the correlation here ,i have plenty of white nationalist buddies who have kids & are great dads. Although I can understand you being a liberal twat & married to a Jew, would champion the multicultural agenda and genocide of our race

But, women know best, we use our intuitive abilities. He is one easy dude to read, pauvre garçon. and at this moment his head off.If you hit rock bottom there is always Know Thyself, you may get lucky, plenty of desperates over "there"

says the bitter old hag but don't loose all hope, some of those 'desperates' might still pay to see those fried egg titties of yours

[reasonvemotion]

Why should anyone give a rats ass about "indigenous people"? These savages are more trouble than they're worth anyways..Australia was on the right track until they abandoned the 'White Australia' immigration policy.

I ask again, would it not be unreasonable to assume a man who wrote the above would not seek out a person of color to be a surrogate to his/her child. No.

Hence my disbelief on your ramblings about surrogacy. Your fragile confidence in yourself is blatantly clear, by your abusive response to what is obviously proven true by your above remarks. To resort to "trying" to belittle me just does not work. I think the most sensible answer for you is to seek out women of more intelligence and confidence than you are currently carousing with. Have a conversation.

[johngalthasspoken]

surrogacy is legal in a number of states,there's no reason to seek an Indian surrogate.I've read somewhere in an article about Australian couples coming here to have children through surrogacy.

[reasonvemotion]

The reason it is difficult to accept what you put forth, is the aura of mistrust that you bring from Know Thyself.

I have given my opinion of this and if you are sincere I wish you well.