What do men and women actually really want from each other?

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Skepdick
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Re: What do men and women actually really want from each other?

Post by Skepdick » Sat Sep 07, 2019 11:58 am

Dontaskme wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 11:54 am
I didn't know you don't want to solve it did I?
But you knew if you want to solve it, didn't you?

Whether it can or can't be solved is a secondary concern.

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Dontaskme
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Re: What do men and women actually really want from each other?

Post by Dontaskme » Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:07 pm

Skepdick wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 11:58 am
Dontaskme wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 11:54 am
I didn't know you don't want to solve it did I?
But you knew if you want to solve it, didn't you?

But I don't know how to solve it, and because I don't know how to solve it, for me, it can't be solved - how can I solve what is a mystery to me, a mystery of what I have no knowledge of ?

Wtf is your problem?

Skepdick
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Re: What do men and women actually really want from each other?

Post by Skepdick » Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:14 pm

Dontaskme wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:07 pm
But I don't know how to solve it
But the "how" is only important to those who want to solve it. Do you want to solve it?
Dontaskme wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:07 pm
, and because I don't know how to solve it, for me, it can't be solved - how can I solve what is a mystery to me, a mystery of what I have no knowledge of ?

Wtf is your problem?
I don't have a problem, but it appears that you do. Your problem is that you don't know whether you want to solve the mystery or not.

The "how" comes after.

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Dontaskme
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Re: What do men and women actually really want from each other?

Post by Dontaskme » Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:28 pm

Skepdick wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:14 pm
Dontaskme wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:07 pm
But I don't know how to solve it
But the "how" is only important to those who want to solve it. Do you want to solve it?
If I knew how then yes I would want to solve it, but I don't know.

Skepdick wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:14 pm
I don't have a problem, but it appears that you do. Your problem is that you don't know whether you want to solve the mystery or not.

The "how" comes after.
I already know I cannot solve the mystery, because I would still be part of the mystery I am trying solve wouldn't I' ?

''How'' doesn't even enter into it does it?

.

Skepdick
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Re: What do men and women actually really want from each other?

Post by Skepdick » Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:30 pm

Dontaskme wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:28 pm
If I knew how then yes I would want to solve it, but I don't know.

I already know I cannot solve the mystery, because I would still be part of the mystery I am trying solve wouldn't I' ?

''How'' doesn't even enter into it does it?
Indeed. If you know that you want to solve it, but you also know that you can't solve it, then trying to learn HOW to solve it seems pointless.

You are going to have to forget some of what you know...

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Re: What do men and women actually really want from each other?

Post by Dontaskme » Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:40 pm

Skepdick wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:30 pm
Dontaskme wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:28 pm
If I knew how then yes I would want to solve it, but I don't know.

I already know I cannot solve the mystery, because I would still be part of the mystery I am trying solve wouldn't I' ?

''How'' doesn't even enter into it does it?
Indeed. If you know that you want to solve it, but you also know that you can't solve it, then trying to learn HOW to solve it seems pointless.
You were the first one to mention the word HOW here not me ..you asked me if I could - would I?
But I already knew I couldn't, and so any notion that I could would be pointless you are right, what do you want here, a medal?

You mentioned the word HOW implying there was a HOW which I then confirmed to you there is no I that can know HOW
Skepdick wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:30 pm
Why would I tell you how to solve it if I don't want to solve it?
So yeah, then trying to learn HOW to solve it seems pointless indeed, I never doubted that for a minute.

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Re: What do men and women actually really want from each other?

Post by Skepdick » Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:43 pm

Dontaskme wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:40 pm
You were the first one to mention the word HOW here not me ..you asked me if I could - would I?
But I already knew I couldn't, and so any notion that I could would be pointless you are right, what do you want here, a medal?

You mentioned the word HOW implying there was a HOW which I then confirmed to you there is no I that can know HOW
Skepdick wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:30 pm
Why would I tell you how to solve it if I don't want to solve it?
So yeah, then trying to learn HOW to solve it seems pointless indeed, I never doubted that for a minute.
I don't know if there is a how. You don't know either.

But I am told that if there is a will there is a way.

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Dontaskme
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Re: What do men and women actually really want from each other?

Post by Dontaskme » Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:45 pm

Skepdick wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:43 pm

But I am told that if there is a will there is a way.
That still begs the question of what wills the way.

The truth is, no one knows.

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Re: What do men and women actually really want from each other?

Post by Skepdick » Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:46 pm

Dontaskme wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:45 pm
That still begs the question of what wills the way.

The truth is, no one knows.
Whatever wills the way doesn't want to figure it out.

So it doesn't matter.

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Dontaskme
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Re: What do men and women actually really want from each other?

Post by Dontaskme » Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:51 pm

Skepdick wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:46 pm
Dontaskme wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:45 pm
That still begs the question of what wills the way.

The truth is, no one knows.
Whatever wills the way doesn't want to figure it out.

So it doesn't matter.
Reality is a mystery that cannot be solved because Whatever wills the way doesn't want to figure it out.

So it doesn't matter...congratulations, time for a cuppa tea.

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Re: What do men and women actually really want from each other?

Post by Dachshund » Sat Sep 07, 2019 2:07 pm

Dontaskme wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 10:54 am
.

However!! :shock: and this is a HUGE however.....
Life for me, is, was and always will be a total mystery that can never be solved, and because the mind always seems to be searching for answers that in my opinion can never be found is why that painting ''The Scream by Edvard Munch'' speaks so loudly to me in literally millions of ways.

.

Dear DAM,


I think that maybe you have experienced - for whatever reason/s - some depression, anxiety or stress over recent weeks or months. Generally bouts of these negative emotions are self-limiting, though if they persist for a material length of time, they can induce deep despair. This affliction with deep despair ("hopelessness") is referred to by psychologists as an existential crisis. An existential crisis occurs when a person is led to question the meaning, value, worth, purpose, etc; of life and experiences great personal anguish in consequence. The Edvard Munch painting is a portrait of the "Existential Crisis" ( a "silent scream" of torment and fear).

You say you are a nihilist ?


In that case, I have a query for you...
.

I believe - (correct me if I'm mistaken) - it's the case that a nihilist denies the value (meaningfulness) of everything; but she also denies everything as a whole (knowledge, numbers, objects...you name it) and that's actually also why she finds everything meaningless (for apparently nothing true exists). But by denying EVERYTHING, she also denies the logic that led her to deny all things ? So it seems that nihilism at its very roots denies itself ! :D


Regards


Dachshund (Der Uberweiner)


PS: I find all of the posts that you have sent to this thread perfectly comprehensible and meaningful; they do not strike me as lines of meaningless drivel written in absurd symbols. Do you ?

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Lacewing
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Re: What do men and women actually really want from each other?

Post by Lacewing » Sat Sep 07, 2019 4:27 pm

Dontaskme wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 11:51 am
what about attachment?
It's something we form isn't it, and yet nothing is ours to attach to as everything is constantly changing, coming and going, it seems there is nothing we can call our own. It seems ONE is a lonely number
Some might say that ONE is the ONLY number, and that everything is ours -- so the idea of other numbers or of "attaching" to anything "other" is a story. Stories are entertaining and convincing -- but when they feel bad, it's helpful recognizing them for what they are and the way they can control and deplete our energy.

The constant changing, coming, and going is acceptable when we can see ourselves (for example) as part of a flowing universal river along with all else. Or like waves in an ocean, rising and falling from something greater. There can be peace in being part of something greater without all the stories that stir up ego and fear.
Dontaskme wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 11:51 am
The gift of EXPERIENCE is not always what we want, the gift sometimes is not welcome, but it still has to be endured, we cannot refuse the gift of life, for we never asked for it in the first place, we have no choice but to endure it, we have to open the gift whether we want it or not, and it's not always what we want.
Agreed. So maybe that can inspire us to expand our perception for appreciating such gifts. For example, I can look at my last relationship and see what it taught/showed me, despite the constant and confusing spin I had to endure, and I can appreciate that I understood the full nature of that gift soon enough to give it away. I can also say it was entertaining, and there were some sweet moments that were truly sweet, despite the exhaustion and exasperation of dealing with it, so...I'm glad it was given to me, and I'm glad I didn't try to hold onto it.
Dontaskme wrote:
Fri Sep 06, 2019 1:14 pm
I've always liked you Lacy right from the start, even though I've not always shown it in some of the past banter we've shared with each other. I love your sense of humor though, it sparks off a good giggle in this one here. :wink: :D
Well, that's what you say in THIS moment. :twisted: Seriously, that's nice to hear. I know I get rough with my online play. It's such a release and dance of energy. I'm talking to online characters who are presenting themselves in different ways. It's a stage -- like life. But it's a very free stage, where anything goes... and that can be amazing and hilarious... if one has a perspective for that. We can see so much about our human selves in these interactions. I suppose it brings up hate or rage for some people...which is rooted in their stories. There are endless WAYS to experience our short time on planet earth.
Dontaskme wrote:
Fri Sep 06, 2019 1:14 pm
I like Harbal as well, although he had to grow on me, at first I couldn't work him out...but he's actually ok, a very funny character. Assuming he is a he, I have no idea.
He made me laugh so hard... I loved it. There were people who would seek out his posts for entertainment. But some people took offense, and we know how that can squash creativity. I think he's still around sometimes...but he seems to mostly keep quiet. :cry:

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Sculptor
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Re: What do men and women actually really want from each other?

Post by Sculptor » Sat Sep 07, 2019 6:17 pm

Dachshund wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 3:02 am
Sculptor wrote:
Fri Sep 06, 2019 11:09 pm

I think not. I've lived 59 years, had 21 sex partners, and had sex too many times to keep count.

You DIRTY old man !!


On the subject of sexuality, I'll tell you a funny story. When I was 19 y.o. and studying for my first degree. I used to spend a lot of time playing pinball in the University's recreation centre with my mates. This was back in the days when Pinball machines were still popular - i.e; a long time ago now. Because we were young boys and all of us had been educated in private boys' Grammar schools, the topic of wanking was often discussed while we "played the silver ball."



Anyway, a character who we were friendly with was a champion Rugby player called Barry. His nick-name was "Cherry Cheer" (a fizzy red soda drink) as he was under strict instructions not to get drunk on beer in public while he was playing Rugby for the University.Barry was 6 foot 6 inches tall and built like a German tank. He was a forward and, as I say, he played for the University's A team. He went on play for Queensland and was unlucky not to have been selected to represent Australia in the later half of the 1980's.



So, one Friday, me and the gang are playing Pinball in the Rec Centre and discussing how the stress of the looming end of Semester exams results in a compensatory increase in daily masturbation frequency (masturbation being an effective way to treat episode of acute stress/anxiety/tension. We're taking about this when Barry arrives at our Pinball table. "Hey Bazza !" we say. "Hi guys"; what's goin' down ?" he asks. Aw, we're just talkin' about how Timmy wanks himself seven times a day during "SWOTVAC" (the week before the end of semester exams commence). Timmy's face turns bright red and everyone laughs. "Well", says Barry as he focuses on the silver ball he's playing, "I used to do a lot of wanking like that too, but now I'm heavily into fruitiality ? "What's that? ", we ask. "What you do is buy some paw paw fruits from the supermarket and put 'em in the fridge at home. Then, when you feel the urge to have a wank you take out a paw paw and cut a circular hole in the skin at one end, then you put it in the microwave, but not for too long, just long enough to make it warm. Then you insert the old mentula through the hole you've cut and give the paw paw a good seeing to. It's great coz the fruit inside is all squishy and juicy and there's lots of round black seeds inside that add to the stimulation."



There's a pregnant pause. Nobody dares to laugh or tell Barry that it all sounds just a little bit sick. Finally, - cowards that we were -, we say, "Yeah, sounds ace Bazza" and "Good thinking Baz , might give the old fruitiality a try myself this week-end - can you do it with pineapples and watermelons ?"


(That's a true story BTW, I kid you not)


Regards

Dachshund (Der Uberweiner)
Yuk.
Remind me too refuse fruit if offered from a Grammar school boy.
I suppose it saves wear and tear. I hear, though that pineapple is a meat tenderiser and might take the skin off - so beware. A company of allied soldiers in WW2 were cut off from supplies in somewhere life Sumatra or other eastern jungle - Pineapple was basically all they had to eat. They lost their teeth because their gums rotted away.

Since you are of that "bent" you should look up the "biscuit game" as written about by Stephen Fry.

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Sculptor
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Re: What do men and women actually really want from each other?

Post by Sculptor » Sat Sep 07, 2019 6:20 pm

Dachshund wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 3:02 am
Sculptor wrote:
Fri Sep 06, 2019 11:09 pm

I think not. I've lived 59 years, had 21 sex partners, and had sex too many times to keep count.

You DIRTY old man !!


Regards

Dachshund (Der Uberweiner)
Actually given the length of time, the number is quite modest compared with my peers.

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Dontaskme
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Re: What do men and women actually really want from each other?

Post by Dontaskme » Sun Sep 08, 2019 11:21 am

Dachshund wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 2:07 pm

Dear DAM,
I think that maybe you have experienced - for whatever reason/s - some depression, anxiety or stress over recent weeks or months. Generally bouts of these negative emotions are self-limiting, though if they persist for a material length of time, they can induce deep despair. This affliction with deep despair ("hopelessness") is referred to by psychologists as an existential crisis. An existential crisis occurs when a person is led to question the meaning, value, worth, purpose, etc; of life and experiences great personal anguish in consequence. The Edvard Munch painting is a portrait of the "Existential Crisis" ( a "silent scream" of torment and fear).
Thank you Dr Dash for your diagnosis of the human condition.
Although in essence I do agree with your overall evaluation regarding the phenomena of what it feels like to be a human. I can agree that how all those emotions you've mentioned above can apparently feel as though there is a human here experiencing this phenomena and that it's really happening for many people, but for me personally, I have overcome the addiction to this emotional self. I've died before I've died. Life for me, is like the life of my cats, totally zenned out. Except when I'm on this forum talking about reality how it really appears to me using the knowledge I have about it, before it is often sugar-coated with false fanciful flavors as if one was trying to cover the real truth, by spraying perfume on a pig to make it appear more desirable, that or we are constantly applying make-up to the mirror, which in my opinion only makes the unbearable false sense of separation seemingly more bearable so to speak.
Dachshund wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 2:07 pm
You say you are a nihilist ?


In that case, I have a query for you...


I believe - (correct me if I'm mistaken) - it's the case that a nihilist denies the value (meaningfulness) of everything; but she also denies everything as a whole (knowledge, numbers, objects...you name it) and that's actually also why she finds everything meaningless (for apparently nothing true exists). But by denying EVERYTHING, she also denies the logic that led her to deny all things ? So it seems that nihilism at its very roots denies itself ! :D
I don't know what to say about your thoughts on what you think nihilism means.
All I can say in response is that I started to deny myself when I realised I didn't have one. I don't deny life itself, just myself, the one I think I have.
Dachshund wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 2:07 pm
PS: I find all of the posts that you have sent to this thread perfectly comprehensible and meaningful; they do not strike me as lines of meaningless drivel written in absurd symbols. Do you ?
They are meaningful only in the sense of what the mind puts there. I mean without the mind as my projection screen, where do I happen, where do I appear? what the heck is anything at all without what the mind puts there?

A mind in my opinion doesn't exist except as a false belief that no one aka everyone is believing. For me, when there is no belief, there is no viable story arsing here to be believed in. It's all just an empty passing show. Meaning is added to what is not actually meaningful...in other words, the meaningless is meaning.
In the same context, there is no entity or real character actually there in the cartoon character Homer Simpson...it's just an empty image of the imageless.

That which is seen is the seer that cannot be seen. Things are not seen, they are known conceptually in this conception, this story, and that which is known can know nothing.

A lot of people cannot accept the fact that there is absolutely nothing looking out of their eyes. But I do.



.

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