Poetry here.
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Re: Poetry here.
Pandora's Box
Who's box?
My box
This is not
How did it get
Into my hand
This is something
I do not understand
A moment ago
My hand was empty
Now the box
Weighs it gently
I think this box
May be a gift
A gift from heaven
Perhaps?
Or if not
Then the Devil
May have it back
But a box it is
That sits in my hand
As I hold it dearly
And pull it near
Do I open it
I wonder
And tremble
With Fear
Perhaps
This box is best
To stay closed
What is in it
I do not know
A gift or worse
Perhaps even a curse
I'll leave this box
Unopened
For better or worse
Who's box?
My box
This is not
How did it get
Into my hand
This is something
I do not understand
A moment ago
My hand was empty
Now the box
Weighs it gently
I think this box
May be a gift
A gift from heaven
Perhaps?
Or if not
Then the Devil
May have it back
But a box it is
That sits in my hand
As I hold it dearly
And pull it near
Do I open it
I wonder
And tremble
With Fear
Perhaps
This box is best
To stay closed
What is in it
I do not know
A gift or worse
Perhaps even a curse
I'll leave this box
Unopened
For better or worse
Last edited by Gary Childress on Mon Apr 22, 2019 6:50 pm, edited 1 time in total.
- attofishpi
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Re: Poetry here.
Good poem Gazza! Was that one of yours? ...the only bit I didn't like was the conversion from hand - singular - to hands - plural.
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Re: Poetry here.
Thank you and good catch. I changed it to singular. Thanks for catching it.attofishpi wrote: ↑Mon Apr 22, 2019 4:47 pm Good poem Gazza! Was that one of yours? ...the only bit I didn't like was the conversion from hand - singular - to hands - plural.
Yes it is mine. I wrote it recently in a writing workshop at a local library. The writing prompt we were given was something like, "you have a box in your hand, who's box is it, what's in it and how did it get there."
- attofishpi
- Posts: 10012
- Joined: Tue Aug 16, 2011 8:10 am
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Re: Poetry here.
Good work dude!Gary Childress wrote: ↑Mon Apr 22, 2019 6:51 pmThank you and good catch. I changed it to singular. Thanks for catching it.attofishpi wrote: ↑Mon Apr 22, 2019 4:47 pm Good poem Gazza! Was that one of yours? ...the only bit I didn't like was the conversion from hand - singular - to hands - plural.
Yes it is mine. I wrote it recently in a writing workshop at a local library. The writing prompt we were given was something like, "you have a box in your hand, who's box is it, what's in it and how did it get there."
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Re: Poetry here.
Thank you. I wish I could remember the exact poem the facilitator of the workshop wrote for the prompt, though. She writes along with us and does some absolutely amazing stuff on spur of the moment. Hoping to get to where she is some day--if ever. But even if not, it's all fun and we all have a good time.attofishpi wrote: ↑Mon Apr 22, 2019 7:11 pmGood work dude!Gary Childress wrote: ↑Mon Apr 22, 2019 6:51 pmThank you and good catch. I changed it to singular. Thanks for catching it.attofishpi wrote: ↑Mon Apr 22, 2019 4:47 pm Good poem Gazza! Was that one of yours? ...the only bit I didn't like was the conversion from hand - singular - to hands - plural.
Yes it is mine. I wrote it recently in a writing workshop at a local library. The writing prompt we were given was something like, "you have a box in your hand, who's box is it, what's in it and how did it get there."![]()
Re: Poetry here.
i like poems with rhyme myself - but that makes me centuries out of date ;-/.
Re: Poetry here.
It's more likely that the talent for it is missing. Most of the time when "some poet" attempts it, it turns out to be complete rubbish only proving they have no ability to write it. Music is in much the same situation.
Re: Poetry here.
exactly! i loathe rap, but have hear it unforunately. where the singer goes out of his way to make rhyme when the result is just utter crap.
sorry, but that is my thoughts on rap.
I like instrumentation/melody instinctually - so i like Rock/Pop/classical...........as long as there is melody i can follow (I hate Jazz because , though it offers instrumentation, it is too complex to hook to a melody).
To clarify, i hate rap because the "Singer" talks over the beat - i just note that most rap also makes rhyme for the sake of nonesense.
so yes!
I'd like my poems to rhyme - but not at the cost of cogency.
thanks for reply Sir.
Re: Poetry here.
sorry full off topic now (music) - but wish to add my observations.
its a spectrum ......noting that Beat and Melody are independent components (I like both, but personally am 40/60 myself - i utterly ignore lyrics - of course i find most others do not, fine, just for me to take the mental energy to listen to lyrics lessens my instinctual love for music - there have been time that i found out a particular song i loved for its beat/melody was actually singing about something important! and i never knew! ( - where the lyrics are front and center (like "for whats its worth" - i loved the beat and melody and also noted the message (which i support fully) - just most time the lyrics are "Behind" the beat/instruments, and so without my hearing/noting - lol.
per "musical spectrum"
i find:
from beat to melody (those two are not nes linked - there is not link actually - nor does there need to be - but they seem to be linked in the final production of music.
From Beat to Melody:
Rap, Pop, Rock-Real-country (old school country) Bluegrass-folk (this latter does include lyrics too - i just do not note them), New Age (the good stuff - windom hill era), and finally Classical.
i like minor cords/discondance - so that leaves out Motsart(sp) - more Prokoviev myself.
anyway, iv'e trolled this thread enough.
carry on Sir.
its a spectrum ......noting that Beat and Melody are independent components (I like both, but personally am 40/60 myself - i utterly ignore lyrics - of course i find most others do not, fine, just for me to take the mental energy to listen to lyrics lessens my instinctual love for music - there have been time that i found out a particular song i loved for its beat/melody was actually singing about something important! and i never knew! ( - where the lyrics are front and center (like "for whats its worth" - i loved the beat and melody and also noted the message (which i support fully) - just most time the lyrics are "Behind" the beat/instruments, and so without my hearing/noting - lol.
per "musical spectrum"
i find:
from beat to melody (those two are not nes linked - there is not link actually - nor does there need to be - but they seem to be linked in the final production of music.
From Beat to Melody:
Rap, Pop, Rock-Real-country (old school country) Bluegrass-folk (this latter does include lyrics too - i just do not note them), New Age (the good stuff - windom hill era), and finally Classical.
i like minor cords/discondance - so that leaves out Motsart(sp) - more Prokoviev myself.
anyway, iv'e trolled this thread enough.
carry on Sir.
Re: Poetry here.
BTW the best "song" ever given to mankind to date (IMO) - is Samuel Barber's Adigio for Strings/and the related choral work (they sing about God in latin - not that i understood what they were saying), cought up in the melody of the chorus/ which was same as the instrumental version melody wise.
Barber was a "one hit wonder" IMO - i looked to find his other offerings 30 yrs ago after viewing Platoon, and though not bad, but fab (oh wow i made a rhyme!) either.
Barber was a "one hit wonder" IMO - i looked to find his other offerings 30 yrs ago after viewing Platoon, and though not bad, but fab (oh wow i made a rhyme!) either.
Re: Poetry here.
...something like this?gaffo wrote: ↑Mon May 20, 2019 10:08 pm BTW the best "song" ever given to mankind to date (IMO) - is Samuel Barber's Adigio for Strings/and the related choral work (they sing about God in latin - not that i understood what they were saying), cought up in the melody of the chorus/ which was same as the instrumental version melody wise.
Barber was a "one hit wonder" IMO - i looked to find his other offerings 30 yrs ago after viewing Platoon, and though not bad, but fab (oh wow i made a rhyme!) either.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k90bcBy_vzg
Re: Poetry here.
yep! but of course - to be pedantic - that is not Adagio for Strings, its the coral version - the title i do not know forgetting and not knowing latin.Dubious wrote: ↑Mon May 20, 2019 10:24 pm...something like this?gaffo wrote: ↑Mon May 20, 2019 10:08 pm BTW the best "song" ever given to mankind to date (IMO) - is Samuel Barber's Adigio for Strings/and the related choral work (they sing about God in latin - not that i understood what they were saying), cought up in the melody of the chorus/ which was same as the instrumental version melody wise.
Barber was a "one hit wonder" IMO - i looked to find his other offerings 30 yrs ago after viewing Platoon, and though not bad, but fab (oh wow i made a rhyme!) either.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k90bcBy_vzg
same "song" so ya.
Vaughn william's work Fantasia is almost as good - and second best work of all time - lol. imo.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ihx5LCF1yJY
I've know the name V Williams for 30 yrs or so, but never stumbled upon his works until this one around 6 months ago.
sublime. i do not know if his other works are as good - or if he is also a one hit wonder. either way he and Barber surely will sit at the right hand of God!!!!!!!!! just of this work alone! so good as to ignore their personal characters!
i'm an Athiest BTW - but those two works as good enough to make me a believer and save them in my book!
Re: Poetry here.
per "flowery" mosart/stauss (I do like the latter a lot BTW) prokiofiev(sp) wrote his 1st as a lark (per my undersanding) - wrote conventional "song" in the style his teachers would like.
and its great! (imo)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p5jL6Ma9tvk
but not his "calling" - i think his calling was his 4th - and more my taste as a melancoly liking discord and minors
1928?29?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=10soAToOy4U
of course i like both below for the same nature:
Hindemith 1932?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=znXWfmfPh8E
mussorgsky 1890?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=syLm-9JyhuY
carry on. BTW the Russians rule (fk the russians btw - glad i ain't in Eastern Europe or the Baltics) classical music (or they did a century ago at least).
and its great! (imo)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p5jL6Ma9tvk
but not his "calling" - i think his calling was his 4th - and more my taste as a melancoly liking discord and minors
1928?29?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=10soAToOy4U
of course i like both below for the same nature:
Hindemith 1932?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=znXWfmfPh8E
mussorgsky 1890?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=syLm-9JyhuY
carry on. BTW the Russians rule (fk the russians btw - glad i ain't in Eastern Europe or the Baltics) classical music (or they did a century ago at least).
Re: Poetry here.
From YT...
Samuel Barber rejected many arrangements, of Adagio for Strings, published by G. Schirmer, such as the organ arrangement by William Strickland. However he did transcribe the piece in 1967 for eight-part choir, as a setting of the Agnus Dei ("Lamb of God").
Re: Poetry here.
WOW, did not know! thanks for the education Sir!Dubious wrote: ↑Mon May 20, 2019 11:19 pmFrom YT...
Samuel Barber rejected many arrangements, of Adagio for Strings, published by G. Schirmer, such as the organ arrangement by William Strickland. However he did transcribe the piece in 1967 for eight-part choir, as a setting of the Agnus Dei ("Lamb of God").