how can I make sure I am happy on my death bed?

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SpheresOfBalance
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Re: how can I make sure I am happy on my death bed?

Post by SpheresOfBalance »

ukelly wrote:Hi

Not sure if this is a philosophy question. I asked this in a science forum and they said it's not science. I am pretty sure it's philosophy.

sometimes, I discover a new way of doing something, and then I am like "all these years I was doing it wrong. If I had only known this better way, how cool would it be"

I will give you a simple example. let's say you don't know scanners with document feeders exist. So you have a scanner without a feeder. every day, you have to scan a bunch of papers. you waste so much time doing this. Then suddenly, you discover this other kind of scanner that has a feeder. You can just feed it and forget it. then you think "all this time I wasted so much time, I WISH I had known about this other scanner"

Now I will extrapolate that to life. how can I live my life to the fullest? How can I make sure that on my death bed, I won't be like "all this time, I lived like this, I wish I had lived this other way, which is better"?

Does that make sense to anyone what I am asking?
I see that everyday that one is alive they should simply be happy that they are. Each one of us has been given an opportunity to sense the beauty of life, nature and all it's complex permutations. I see that working, as with a scanner, or other such thing, is only to be used to buy your freedom, to since the miraculousness and beauty of the universe, in all it's complexity. To me "work" as in these modern times, is not really very important. If one is saving someones life, or nurturing a young mind, or doing anything that somehow truly benefits someone, then it matters not how tedious the process, all one has to do is look as the results and smile. There was a song in the 80's that said: "Everybody's working for the weekend," and I see this as largely true for all those that are not much rewarded, with trying, repetitive, seemingly futile, tasks.

So in what ever you do, try and find the beauty, as it pertains to this gift that has been bestowed upon you, life, and you'll never have any regrets, at least of any real substance! ;-)
Skip
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Re: how can I make sure I am happy on my death bed?

Post by Skip »

marjoramblues wrote:Skip: Might be a simple matter of cutting off relations with an overly critical parent

Simple matter? How so? And what about the happiness of the perceived 'overly critical' parent ?
Once you are convinced that a relationship is too costly - that is, gives you more pain than pleasure - and that you can't improve it through persuasion, discussion, confrontation, compromise or whatever methods you've tried - then, yes, it does become simple.
When in doubt, employ The Gut Test:
- Daughter and son-in-law are coming to dinner. (What is your stomach doing? Flutters? jumping for joy? Twisting into knots?)
- No, they can't make it, after all. (How does stomach react? Sinking or relaxing?)
You just don't need people in your life who cause you anxiety and frustration. The same goes for friends who are always in need of help and solace, but unavailable when you need it.
And, yes, parents who make you feel small and wrong and inept are better cut loose. What about their happiness? If making their child miserable is a source of happiness for them, it's time they started fixing their own life. Maybe, someday, when both parties are stronger and more independent, they can meet again, reconcile and build a better relationship based on mutual respect - but the other has to make an effort, too: it can't be all on you.
Did you make such lists yourself ?
I haven't needed to: I've dealt with each obstacle and challenge as it came up (more or less successfully - sometimes very badly) and never wondered whether I would die happy.
But I have been seeing a friend through some rough patches caused by long-standing problems that they haven't faced - mostly out of consideration for others who don't need or deserve it. The longer you put off dealing with some issues, the more entrenched they become, the more pain they cause. And the more time you waste missing out on potential happiness.
bobevenson
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Re: how can I make sure I am happy on my death bed?

Post by bobevenson »

"how can I make sure I am happy on my death bed?"
Try masturbating one last time.
Advocate
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Re: how can I make sure I am happy on my death bed?

Post by Advocate »

Choose the right overdose.
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Re: how can I make sure I am happy on my death bed?

Post by Advocate »

On a less facetious note, the secret to having a good life is to have done good things at the end of each day. If you care more about external things, success is having a bespoke life.
Scott Mayers
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Re: how can I make sure I am happy on my death bed?

Post by Scott Mayers »

ukelly wrote: Tue Nov 19, 2013 1:15 am Hi

Not sure if this is a philosophy question. I asked this in a science forum and they said it's not science. I am pretty sure it's philosophy.

sometimes, I discover a new way of doing something, and then I am like "all these years I was doing it wrong. If I had only known this better way, how cool would it be"

I will give you a simple example. let's say you don't know scanners with document feeders exist. So you have a scanner without a feeder. every day, you have to scan a bunch of papers. you waste so much time doing this. Then suddenly, you discover this other kind of scanner that has a feeder. You can just feed it and forget it. then you think "all this time I wasted so much time, I WISH I had known about this other scanner"

Now I will extrapolate that to life. how can I live my life to the fullest? How can I make sure that on my death bed, I won't be like "all this time, I lived like this, I wish I had lived this other way, which is better"?

Does that make sense to anyone what I am asking?
If MDMA/Ecstasy is the 'happy' drug those who took it claim it is, take enough to get you there and then take a happy dive off a cliff. I don't think it will matter to be concerned about some 'legacy' if you can no longer regret what you could have been!?
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