An Introspective Look at Choice
Posted: Tue Jan 01, 2013 9:56 pm
Could I have chosen differently than what I actually chose?
At first glance, this question seems silly, as it feels very obvious that I have the power to choose as I please and therefore could have chosen differently than what I had actually chose. This inner power, that I call free-will, allows me to freely exert my will so as to be the intentional self-causer of my choices. In other words, free-will is the power that allows me to freely choose as I so please.
Could I have chosen differently than what I actually chose? Well, first I need to take a closer look at a simple choice to try to see what all is going on. How about the choice that I am confronted with when I walk into a McDonald's and ask for an ice cream cone? The counter girl will then ask me "vanilla or chocolate?", and then shortly thereafter, I will verbally proclaim my choice. It is during this time period of 'shortly thereafter' that my power of free-will emerges and exerts itself as the causer of my choice, and it is here where I need to take a closer look.
My main problem here is trying to recall all that which transpired in that very short period of time, between the counter girl's question and the proclamation of my choice. In football's 'instant replay', they simply rewind the tape, playback in slow motion, and zoom in to take a closer look, so as to clearly see and review all that what really just happened. This is a bit tricky for me because the only playback tape that I have exists as my memory, which fades with time, becoming unclear and fuzzy if I wait too long to recall and replay it. Also, my memory only records my conscious events. As for the unconscious events, I have no memory of them.
Since free-will choices, such as choosing between vanilla and chocolate, are consciously (knowingly) made, then a memory should exist that I can then recall and review. Choices made unconsciously (without my knowledge), or caused by unconscious events, are not of my free-will. Since I don't control my unconscious, I therefore do not control the choices made by my unconscious.
Great chess players have the ability to clearly see many moves forward. How many moves backwards can I clearly see? Can I recall and clearly see all the moves that led up to my choice? Can I enact 'instant replay'? Without instant replay, the actual events (thoughts and feelings) that led up to my choice, those that occurred in that time period of 'shortly thereafter', seem to be bundled up in fuzziness. In my mind, I seem to quickly equate this fuzziness as the power of my free-will in action. I tend to associate, or even justify, this fuzziness as my free-will. But, aren't these, 'fuzziness' and 'free-will' different things, or are they the same, but with different names? If I could clear away the fuzziness to expose all that which occurred during this time period, would free-will still be there, and if so, where, and how would I know?
Okay, back to McDonald's. Since I'm not really there right now (as I am writing at the moment), I will have to use my imagination to simulate the making of this choice, and then attempt to create an 'instant replay' tape by very quickly recalling my memory of making this choice. Here goes. The counter girl just asked me "vanilla or chocolate?". --- "Hmmm..." I say, "Chocolate it is!". --- (approximately 2 seconds transpired in making this choice). So now I quickly recall my memory and playback in slow motion to try to catch all the events that occurred during these 2 seconds. Here they are: "Hmmm", "vanilla is healthier, but chocolate tastes better, but in case I drop some on my white shirt, vanilla won't stain as badly as the chocolate, but chocolate has caffeine and I am really tired, and chocolate makes me feel better. 3 for chocolate, 2 for vanilla, therefore chocolate wins", "Chocolate it is!".
The fuzziness has cleared, and I can now see the conscious events that led up to my choice. Playing my memory tape backwards, I can see that this choice (chocolate) was actually caused by a reason (chocolate 3 > vanilla 2). And I see that this reason was caused by a reasoning process. And I see each of the variables of this reasoning process; an algorithm (majority rule) and 5 factors (1- vanilla is healthier, 2- chocolate tastes better, 3- vanilla won't stain as much, 4- chocolate has caffeine, and 5- chocolate makes me feel better). But that is it, that is all. This 2 second tape has completely rewound to its beginning. There are no more conscious events to be seen on this tape.
So where's the free-will? Where on this tape did I exert my power of free-will? What event did I cause or choose? Where did I get to say "Shazam!" and be the causer of this choice? Or at least cause an event that caused this choice? According to my memory, 'I' haven't chosen anything. This choice of chocolate was caused by its reason, which in turn was caused by its reasoning process. And this reasoning process was determined by its variables. So where does free-will fit in, where in here do 'I' choose and make this choice mine? Okay, I need to relax and look at this rationally. If I didn't directly choose my choice or its reason, then I must have chosen the reasoning variables that did ultimately determine my choice of chocolate. So yes, it was I that chose to consider these particular factors, and it was I that chose to let majority rule dictate the outcome of my choice. And because of this, I can now claim this choice as mine.
But wait, if I did 'choose' all these reasoning variables, then shouldn't I have some knowledge or memory of doing so? But I don't. I have no memories of choosing any of these reasoning variables. So where did they come from? Why did I choose what I did? Why did I choose these particular factors and not others? And why only 5 factors, why not 3, or 10? And why did I choose to let majority rule dictate my reasoning process? Shouldn't I have assigned a higher value to that which is healthier for me, or better yet, why not just let my strongest feeling dictate my choice? I don't know, it just is what it is, as I did not consciously choose any of these variables. It's as if they just popped into my head, into my awareness, at that split moment in time when I needed something to reason with.
On a side thought, even if I were able to knowingly 'choose' each of these variables, then wouldn't each of these new choices then themselves require a reason? For how is it possible to consciously choose anything without some reason? And furthermore, how is it also possible to consciously derive a reason without considering things (i.e. other choices)? So then, it would seem that choice requires a reason, and reason requires choices, and these new choices then each require their own reasons, and each of these new reasons then each require their own choices, and so on for-ev-ver. At some point this potentially endless chain of mental deliberations must originate from a point outside my conscious control, otherwise I would never be able to make a choice as it would consume an infinte amount of time and memory to do so.
Okay, so have I been just kicking the can down the road, delaying the inevitable originating cause of my choice as the one flowing from my unconscious? How far back must I go before I realize that the source of my choices ultimately emanate from something beyond my conscious means? Looking backwards, I can see and follow the chain of events that led up to my choice, but only until it submerges into my unconscious. I can only recall that which is consciously available. Looking upwards into a waterfall, I can try to see the source of the onward streams of water but only until it disappears into its feeding source. Thus, it appears that my choices are ultimately determined by that which I have no control over.
The philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer once said "A man can do what he wills, but cannot will what he wills". To restate, "I can choose as I so desire, but I cannot choose my desires". The underlying assumption here is that my desires (or will) emanate from my unconscious. And since I do not control my unconscious, I therefore do not control my desires (or will), and therefore nor my choices.
So, AFTER FURTHER REVIEW, it appears that the power of free-will is simply a mirage, an illusionary feeling created by the 'fuzziness of the facts'. I, the conscious me, am only the beneficiary of my choices, and therefore had no choice but to choose as I chose.
At first glance, this question seems silly, as it feels very obvious that I have the power to choose as I please and therefore could have chosen differently than what I had actually chose. This inner power, that I call free-will, allows me to freely exert my will so as to be the intentional self-causer of my choices. In other words, free-will is the power that allows me to freely choose as I so please.
Could I have chosen differently than what I actually chose? Well, first I need to take a closer look at a simple choice to try to see what all is going on. How about the choice that I am confronted with when I walk into a McDonald's and ask for an ice cream cone? The counter girl will then ask me "vanilla or chocolate?", and then shortly thereafter, I will verbally proclaim my choice. It is during this time period of 'shortly thereafter' that my power of free-will emerges and exerts itself as the causer of my choice, and it is here where I need to take a closer look.
My main problem here is trying to recall all that which transpired in that very short period of time, between the counter girl's question and the proclamation of my choice. In football's 'instant replay', they simply rewind the tape, playback in slow motion, and zoom in to take a closer look, so as to clearly see and review all that what really just happened. This is a bit tricky for me because the only playback tape that I have exists as my memory, which fades with time, becoming unclear and fuzzy if I wait too long to recall and replay it. Also, my memory only records my conscious events. As for the unconscious events, I have no memory of them.
Since free-will choices, such as choosing between vanilla and chocolate, are consciously (knowingly) made, then a memory should exist that I can then recall and review. Choices made unconsciously (without my knowledge), or caused by unconscious events, are not of my free-will. Since I don't control my unconscious, I therefore do not control the choices made by my unconscious.
Great chess players have the ability to clearly see many moves forward. How many moves backwards can I clearly see? Can I recall and clearly see all the moves that led up to my choice? Can I enact 'instant replay'? Without instant replay, the actual events (thoughts and feelings) that led up to my choice, those that occurred in that time period of 'shortly thereafter', seem to be bundled up in fuzziness. In my mind, I seem to quickly equate this fuzziness as the power of my free-will in action. I tend to associate, or even justify, this fuzziness as my free-will. But, aren't these, 'fuzziness' and 'free-will' different things, or are they the same, but with different names? If I could clear away the fuzziness to expose all that which occurred during this time period, would free-will still be there, and if so, where, and how would I know?
Okay, back to McDonald's. Since I'm not really there right now (as I am writing at the moment), I will have to use my imagination to simulate the making of this choice, and then attempt to create an 'instant replay' tape by very quickly recalling my memory of making this choice. Here goes. The counter girl just asked me "vanilla or chocolate?". --- "Hmmm..." I say, "Chocolate it is!". --- (approximately 2 seconds transpired in making this choice). So now I quickly recall my memory and playback in slow motion to try to catch all the events that occurred during these 2 seconds. Here they are: "Hmmm", "vanilla is healthier, but chocolate tastes better, but in case I drop some on my white shirt, vanilla won't stain as badly as the chocolate, but chocolate has caffeine and I am really tired, and chocolate makes me feel better. 3 for chocolate, 2 for vanilla, therefore chocolate wins", "Chocolate it is!".
The fuzziness has cleared, and I can now see the conscious events that led up to my choice. Playing my memory tape backwards, I can see that this choice (chocolate) was actually caused by a reason (chocolate 3 > vanilla 2). And I see that this reason was caused by a reasoning process. And I see each of the variables of this reasoning process; an algorithm (majority rule) and 5 factors (1- vanilla is healthier, 2- chocolate tastes better, 3- vanilla won't stain as much, 4- chocolate has caffeine, and 5- chocolate makes me feel better). But that is it, that is all. This 2 second tape has completely rewound to its beginning. There are no more conscious events to be seen on this tape.
So where's the free-will? Where on this tape did I exert my power of free-will? What event did I cause or choose? Where did I get to say "Shazam!" and be the causer of this choice? Or at least cause an event that caused this choice? According to my memory, 'I' haven't chosen anything. This choice of chocolate was caused by its reason, which in turn was caused by its reasoning process. And this reasoning process was determined by its variables. So where does free-will fit in, where in here do 'I' choose and make this choice mine? Okay, I need to relax and look at this rationally. If I didn't directly choose my choice or its reason, then I must have chosen the reasoning variables that did ultimately determine my choice of chocolate. So yes, it was I that chose to consider these particular factors, and it was I that chose to let majority rule dictate the outcome of my choice. And because of this, I can now claim this choice as mine.
But wait, if I did 'choose' all these reasoning variables, then shouldn't I have some knowledge or memory of doing so? But I don't. I have no memories of choosing any of these reasoning variables. So where did they come from? Why did I choose what I did? Why did I choose these particular factors and not others? And why only 5 factors, why not 3, or 10? And why did I choose to let majority rule dictate my reasoning process? Shouldn't I have assigned a higher value to that which is healthier for me, or better yet, why not just let my strongest feeling dictate my choice? I don't know, it just is what it is, as I did not consciously choose any of these variables. It's as if they just popped into my head, into my awareness, at that split moment in time when I needed something to reason with.
On a side thought, even if I were able to knowingly 'choose' each of these variables, then wouldn't each of these new choices then themselves require a reason? For how is it possible to consciously choose anything without some reason? And furthermore, how is it also possible to consciously derive a reason without considering things (i.e. other choices)? So then, it would seem that choice requires a reason, and reason requires choices, and these new choices then each require their own reasons, and each of these new reasons then each require their own choices, and so on for-ev-ver. At some point this potentially endless chain of mental deliberations must originate from a point outside my conscious control, otherwise I would never be able to make a choice as it would consume an infinte amount of time and memory to do so.
Okay, so have I been just kicking the can down the road, delaying the inevitable originating cause of my choice as the one flowing from my unconscious? How far back must I go before I realize that the source of my choices ultimately emanate from something beyond my conscious means? Looking backwards, I can see and follow the chain of events that led up to my choice, but only until it submerges into my unconscious. I can only recall that which is consciously available. Looking upwards into a waterfall, I can try to see the source of the onward streams of water but only until it disappears into its feeding source. Thus, it appears that my choices are ultimately determined by that which I have no control over.
The philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer once said "A man can do what he wills, but cannot will what he wills". To restate, "I can choose as I so desire, but I cannot choose my desires". The underlying assumption here is that my desires (or will) emanate from my unconscious. And since I do not control my unconscious, I therefore do not control my desires (or will), and therefore nor my choices.
So, AFTER FURTHER REVIEW, it appears that the power of free-will is simply a mirage, an illusionary feeling created by the 'fuzziness of the facts'. I, the conscious me, am only the beneficiary of my choices, and therefore had no choice but to choose as I chose.