but I learned that it's not up to me what I deserve and don't deserve. It's up to certain others around me what they think I deserve.
It doesn't matter. I've hit a brick wall and there's nothing to do but give up.reasonvemotion wrote: ↑Tue Feb 07, 2023 5:54 am Gary wrote:
but I learned that it's not up to me what I deserve and don't deserve. It's up to certain others around me what they think I deserve.
Lack of money, a debilitating illness, or a controlling partner or something else.
Imprisoned by what?
Some people have what they want, but then don't want what they have.Gary Childress wrote: ↑Tue Feb 07, 2023 5:22 am Today I Learned:
I learned today that I will never have some things I would like more than anything else in this world AND that I don't deserve them. I wish I deserved them but I learned that it's not up to me what I deserve and don't deserve. It's up to certain others around me what they think I deserve. And it's like them taking candy away from a baby. It's just that easy. I suck...
MaybeGary Childress wrote: ↑Tue Feb 07, 2023 5:22 am Today I Learned:
I learned today that I will never have some things I would like more than anything else in this world AND that I don't deserve them. I wish I deserved them but I learned that it's not up to me what I deserve and don't deserve. It's up to certain others around me what they think I deserve. And it's like them taking candy away from a baby. It's just that easy. I suck...
https://thedailyzen.org/2015/03/20/zen-story-maybe/
There is a Taoist story of an old farmer who had worked his crops for many years. One day his horse ran away. Upon hearing the news, his neighbors came to visit. “Such bad luck,” they said sympathetically. “Maybe,” the farmer replied.
The next morning the horse returned, bringing with it three other wild horses. “How wonderful,” the neighbors exclaimed. “Maybe,” replied the old man.
The following day, his son tried to ride one of the untamed horses, was thrown, and broke his leg. The neighbors again came to offer their sympathy on his misfortune. “Maybe,” answered the farmer.
The day after, military officials came to the village to draft young men into the army. Seeing that the son’s leg was broken, they passed him by. The neighbors congratulated the farmer on how well things had turned out. “Maybe,” said the farmer.
Folks are imprisoned by self-cherishing, and self-cherishing is the cause of all personal problems, including suffering. When nothing can be self-identified to self-cherish, then one can be imprisoned by the need for self-cherishing, and being imprisoned by that need is the secret, unadmitted root cause of dishonesty that obscures reality. Fortunately, understanding self-cherishing, its role and limitations in one's life, helps to dispel the ignorance that causes attachment that causes suffering when the attachment is lost, particularly if loss can't ever be replaced, which is the nature of true loss.reasonvemotion wrote: ↑Tue Feb 07, 2023 5:54 am Gary wrote:
but I learned that it's not up to me what I deserve and don't deserve. It's up to certain others around me what they think I deserve.
Lack of money, a debilitating illness, or a controlling partner or something else.
Imprisoned by what?
Maybe I need the love of a good man as well. However, To “need” someone is to buy yourself a first class ticket to the land of codependence. Wanting, on the other hand, is the first step in learning how to love someone. You want to be around the other person because they make you smile, they make you happier.
Yeah. Kind of looks like I'm going to have to be content with food, shelter and oxygen...for the rest of my short miserable life. Don't get me wrong. I'll be all too happy to be proven wrong, but so far I seem to be batting 1000 on that prediction.
What a gem of a find! ROTFL.One video example is worth a thousand more words:
