A child is able to realize whether a parent is speaking in an honest way or in a manipulative way.Skip wrote:Lying for reward, or to escape harm, is natural. Children would probably invent it independently if they were not taught early enough. But those are not the crazy-making lies.duszek wrote:What lies to children strike you as particularly shameful ?
Children are good at lying themselves, from a very early age on.
Lying seems to be part of human nature.
The crazy-making lies are on the order of:
I'm only hitting you because I love you. It's your fault for making me angry. God so loved the world that he had bad people snuff his innocent son just so he could forgive the good people he was mad at - and you. You must always tell the truth - and I know that's not it. Be yourself - not this self; smarten up. Don't get smart with me, young man! Grandma went to live with the angels. What - you're eight years old and still believe in Santa Claus? Hard work and honesty will always be rewarded. Go on like this, you'll be nothing but a janitor. Money is the root of all evil. Why can't you have a little ambition and become a hedge-fund manager? [Insert name of country] is the best nation on Earth. [Insert name of religion] is the only source of morality. Love thy neighbour. Don't talk to Jorge next door, he's a little hoodlum.
You get the idea.
A child is able to accept a parent´s opinion and disagree with it because he heard something else elsewhere and is more convinced by the latter.
Kids love to taste the forbidden fruit and they love to check for themselves.
Some kids are even ashamed of their parents (alcoholics etc.).
And they are miserable because of this shame.