Philosophy Now Forum

Hobbes' Choice wrote:Duh
So why are you asking your stupid fucking question?

Well duh, to puzzle stupid fucking village idiots like you, moron. And by the way, you misinterpreted what I've said, dunce. So go to hell.

PhilX

Hobbes' Choice wrote:DUh. "Relationships" is a big word and means lots of things. I have a fucking relationship with my government, doctor, dentist, fucking postman for fuck's sake. So yeah You do mean in the narrowest sense.

You got it wrong again shithead. And Hex was right about you, loser.

PhilX

My dick. Otherwise, it's not worth the trouble of sexless life with another.

Philosophy Explorer wrote:I won't bother to define what is meant by good except it should help to promote a relationship.

So what are the keys to a good relationship? Here"s my short list:

Financial stability
Respect
Communication
Sense of humor

Then there's your list.

PhilX

1) A valuable purpose to the relationship. Something that the relationship is meant to achieve, that makes things better for the participants in the long-term view. I'm not saying that it should last long, but that the consequences should be positive and long-term, or else the relationship can be easily be very ineffective at making life in general better for the other person.

2) A committed, reliable approach to achieve this purpose.

3) The ability to integrate closer if necessary for either partner. A relationship with barriers can work for some periods of time, but as new problems and situations arise, the relationship must be able to adapt towards it. If these problems makes the individuals lose contact with one another because of impassable barriers, then one or both of the individuals were unable to adapt towards the other person's sudden needs, and the plan, the purpose, fails. This is another way to say that the relationship is unreliable towards satisfying one or both of the peoples' needs.

A good relationship in my view needs liking and/or love.

An Internet connection and a dating site.

Compatibility.

Next.

creativesoul wrote:Compatibility.

Next.

Next partner? That's it! Multiple partners! Nice.

Whatever floats your boat, as long as no unnecessary harm is being caused, if you can live with it... so be it. I'm too mushy for multiple partners, unless I'm single which doesn't usually last long...

Compatibility is all that's needed for any and all relationships. Now getting into what all that takes isn't nearly as simple, and it's entirely possible for folk to no even have a good grasp upon what counts as being compatible to them or not, so... it's much easier said than realized.

Skip wrote:A relationship needs participants.

What do you need to make a good salad? Skip said it right: vegetables XD. Smart answer, no kidding.

The only thing a good relationship needs is this: the balance for each person in the relationship is weighed to the side of satisfying their wants for that relationship.

All human relationships are doomed to fail or be unsatisfactory. The minority that do succeed is because they have made a pact to not want anything from each other. They allow each other the space to be exactly what they want to be, not what's expected of them.

If a person didn't want anything, why the need to seek relationship in other? and so no matter what reason is given as to why two people would want to couple together, is usually because they both want something from each other. ( I want you, and you are going to give me what I want) The reason this is set up for failure, is because people generally hate not getting what they want, so love and marriage is blind in that respect.

Or, they seek something from other because they don't believe they have it, they seek outside their self in the hope of finding it in the other believing that only through the other will I get what I want. This kind of relationship is doomed to fail because it places conditions,restrictions and demands on someone which does not and has never belonged to you. This includes relationships with friends, neighbours, work mates, family and children. It's kind of like taking freedom away and placing it in a air tight container, not a good idea.

Can you truly and genuinely love a person unless you are allowing that person to do exactly what they want? if you don't like what the person does, and you decide that's not what you want after all, and you leave them, then you never loved them. The words (I love you) is so cheap, it's like a bargaining chip to get what you want. If you give me what I want I will love you forever. The word love is so overrated and false. We all want to be loved, but you are already love and you can love other without ever possessing them. Possession is not real love, it's needy and is doomed to make you very miserable. True love starts with yourself, if you can live alone and be totally happy without the need for other to define or complete you, then and only then can you love another. Most people play the pretend game of love, while the only true way to love is played by the rare few.

The only true and decent relationship to have is the one you have with yourself. If you are happy, fulfilled and content with that, then everyone else is like the cherry on top of the icing.

Dalek Prime wrote:My dick. Otherwise, it's not worth the trouble of sexless life with another.

And who would want to poke that into an orifice that excretes vomit, shit, piss, and blood..

Dontaskme wrote:

Dalek Prime wrote:My dick. Otherwise, it's not worth the trouble of sexless life with another.

And who would want to poke that into an orifice that excretes vomit, shit, piss, and blood..

Me. Seems a great idea at the time.

It needs two human beings.

Then you can come up with a lot of "parameters" like

Love
Physical Attraction
Mutual interests
Mutual want of a relationship
Want of a family
Class compability
Respect for each other

and so on.

But I think it's a mixture of everything, and what is a "good" relationship? Just the thing to be in a relationship, and possibly a family is for many people a good thing in itself.