another psychiatric diagnosis under my belt

Can philosophers help resolve the real problems that people have in their lives?

Moderators: AMod, iMod

madera
Posts: 72
Joined: Thu May 22, 2014 11:45 pm

Re: another psychiatric diagnosis under my belt

Post by madera » Wed May 28, 2014 6:29 pm

Kayla wrote:
madera wrote:Your mom was wise when you were hysterical by sending you to your brother who was the child whisperer in the family, that is where you got it from.
all of my brothers are like super calm so i would make up for it by being their hysterical sister

but only my little brother has this instant calming effect on me
It doesn't look like you had a bad childhood.
all things considered my parents are very sane, despite being southern US baptist republicans
I want to add that your mother did a great thing, I am assuming there was no father in the house and she made a man out of a young men to be a father substitute to you.
Your mom was a woman who loved her kids by doing that.
not sure what made you think that - i grew up with both parents

but the kids were expected to take care of each other as they could - i was very surprised not that long ago to find out that some ppl will actually want money from their parents for babysitting younger siblings - the idea has simply never occurred to me
The thought came to me because:

Your dad may have lived there, but, your mom sent you to your brother for help. Your brother was used as a father substitute.
Whatever, your mom knew your father couldn't take care of the problem. She was wise.

PS
Baptist republicans? God has blessed them.

madera
Posts: 72
Joined: Thu May 22, 2014 11:45 pm

Re: another psychiatric diagnosis under my belt

Post by madera » Wed May 28, 2014 7:08 pm

madera wrote:
Kayla wrote:
madera wrote:Your mom was wise when you were hysterical by sending you to your brother who was the child whisperer in the family, that is where you got it from.
all of my brothers are like super calm so i would make up for it by being their hysterical sister

but only my little brother has this instant calming effect on me
It doesn't look like you had a bad childhood.
all things considered my parents are very sane, despite being southern US baptist republicans
I want to add that your mother did a great thing, I am assuming there was no father in the house and she made a man out of a young men to be a father substitute to you.
Your mom was a woman who loved her kids by doing that.
not sure what made you think that - i grew up with both parents

but the kids were expected to take care of each other as they could - i was very surprised not that long ago to find out that some ppl will actually want money from their parents for babysitting younger siblings - the idea has simply never occurred to me
The thought came to me because:

Your dad may have lived there, but, your mom sent you to your brother for help. Your brother was used as a father substitute.
Whatever, your mom knew your father couldn't take care of the problem. She was wise.

PS
Baptist republicans? God has blessed them.

uwot
Posts: 3251
Joined: Mon Jul 23, 2012 7:21 am

Re: another psychiatric diagnosis under my belt

Post by uwot » Wed May 28, 2014 8:59 pm

madera wrote:PS
Baptist republicans? God has blessed them.
he's not overly generous with his blessings, don't you think?

madera23
Posts: 27
Joined: Mon May 26, 2014 2:28 pm

Re: another psychiatric diagnosis under my belt

Post by madera23 » Wed May 28, 2014 9:11 pm

uwot wrote:
madera wrote:PS
Baptist republicans? God has blessed them.
he's not overly generous with his blessings, don't you think?
If we are too generous with our children, we spoil them.
God is generous with truth. That is a blessing. The problem is that we dont listen.
Blessings come in HIs time, not ours.
I dont think, I know.
I wish I knew HIm earlier in my life, so many mistakes could have been avoided.

madera
Posts: 72
Joined: Thu May 22, 2014 11:45 pm

Re: another psychiatric diagnosis under my belt

Post by madera » Thu May 29, 2014 1:28 am

uwot wrote:
madera wrote:PS
Baptist republicans? God has blessed them.
he's not overly generous with his blessings, don't you think?
I responded, but, it is not showing.
I said He is very generous with truth but many don't hear it.

User avatar
Kayla
Posts: 1108
Joined: Wed Feb 02, 2011 6:31 am

Re: another psychiatric diagnosis under my belt

Post by Kayla » Thu May 29, 2014 3:22 pm

madera wrote: Your dad may have lived there, but, your mom sent you to your brother for help. Your brother was used as a father substitute.
Whatever, your mom knew your father couldn't take care of the problem. She was wise.

PS
Baptist republicans? God has blessed them.
it was a very traditional household in many ways

so it was my mom's job to deal with children in distress - whether physical or psychological - and my dad's job to bbq stuff and do plumbing repair

i found out this morning that my kid brother will be spending the summer holidays with us, i am so happy right now

madera
Posts: 72
Joined: Thu May 22, 2014 11:45 pm

Re: another psychiatric diagnosis under my belt

Post by madera » Thu May 29, 2014 7:18 pm

Kayla wrote:
madera wrote: Your dad may have lived there, but, your mom sent you to your brother for help. Your brother was used as a father substitute.
Whatever, your mom knew your father couldn't take care of the problem. She was wise.

PS
Baptist republicans? God has blessed them.
it was a very traditional household in many ways

so it was my mom's job to deal with children in distress - whether physical or psychological - and my dad's job to bbq stuff and do plumbing repair

i found out this morning that my kid brother will be spending the summer holidays with us, i am so happy right now
Kayla
I have something to share with you, it is my insight concerning your emotional problems.
You may not like what I have to say, but, if will consider it, you can be well today.
In your family you had many brothers and you were the only girl, am I right so far?
Being the only girl you were spoiled and when you didn't get what you want you would go into your hysterics. right so far?
In other words you are a spoiled brat. You are happy when you get what you want and not when you don't get what you want.
Life does not work well that way for life can throw some painful curves and we have to learn to deal with it.
Do you want to continue on that path or do you want to see how spoiled you have been made being special because you were the only girl in the family. That was a failing on your parents side, they gave into your small tantrums until the tantrums became a major problem in your life.
You have a choice, watch and see how easily you get when your wants are not met. Or you can see it and learn how destructive it is.
Anyone that gives into your tantrums now need to be corrected for your own growth. These are not your friends.
Enough said?

User avatar
Kayla
Posts: 1108
Joined: Wed Feb 02, 2011 6:31 am

Re: another psychiatric diagnosis under my belt

Post by Kayla » Fri May 30, 2014 6:43 am

madera wrote: In your family you had many brothers and you were the only girl, am I right so far?
right

one twin brother, one kid brother, one big brother
Being the only girl you were spoiled and when you didn't get what you want you would go into your hysterics. right so far?
i could just as easily go into hysterics because of poor marks or not being able to find stuff or just bad hair

i never generally demanded anything just expressed my feelings

my parents were not ones to give in to hysterical children.

the only issue on which i can think of them losing a battle of wills with me and my twin is our unwillingness to be separated. for a while i would go into screaming hysterics if he was away for more than a few hours (less than that when we were younger) - this continued well into my teens. he would just go sulky and withdrawn. (when we were babies and toddlers i am told we would basically freak if the other was not in sight.)

and if one of us was sick the other would refuse to go to school

after trying to force the issue - thinking that this was not healthy - our parents gave up and let us get more independent of each other at our own pace

and quite a few times i freaked out over arguments with my parents - and ended up apologizing afterwards - recently my mom told me that if I freaked out this generally indicated that i would apologize later and accept their stand on whatever the issue was

i am much better these days - between growing up and medication and anger management
In other words you are a spoiled brat.
maybe a bit lol

boys are expected to do well in school and show a certain amount of stoicism - and any athletic achievement is a big bonus

girls can get away with just being nice - which i could manage between my fits of temperament

Anyone that gives into your tantrums now need to be corrected for your own growth. These are not your friends.
Enough said?
the fits of crying that i had without my meds were not directed to getting anything - i suppose it is possible that they got me affection and attenton that i would not get otherwise - but i dont think they were directed at gaining anything in particular

but i am much better now, seriously - sometimes i think my whole family deserves a sainthood for putting up with me from about 13 to 16 or so

and my bff - to whom i am married now - definitely deserves a sainthood. she stayed my best friend through all of this - always willing to tell me when i was being a stupid brat

madera
Posts: 72
Joined: Thu May 22, 2014 11:45 pm

Re: another psychiatric diagnosis under my belt

Post by madera » Fri May 30, 2014 7:04 pm

Kayla wrote:
madera wrote: In your family you had many brothers and you were the only girl, am I right so far?
right

one twin brother, one kid brother, one big brother
Being the only girl you were spoiled and when you didn't get what you want you would go into your hysterics. right so far?
i could just as easily go into hysterics because of poor marks or not being able to find stuff or just bad hair

i never generally demanded anything just expressed my feelings

my parents were not ones to give in to hysterical children.

the only issue on which i can think of them losing a battle of wills with me and my twin is our unwillingness to be separated. for a while i would go into screaming hysterics if he was away for more than a few hours (less than that when we were younger) - this continued well into my teens. he would just go sulky and withdrawn. (when we were babies and toddlers i am told we would basically freak if the other was not in sight.)

and if one of us was sick the other would refuse to go to school

after trying to force the issue - thinking that this was not healthy - our parents gave up and let us get more independent of each other at our own pace

and quite a few times i freaked out over arguments with my parents - and ended up apologizing afterwards - recently my mom told me that if I freaked out this generally indicated that i would apologize later and accept their stand on whatever the issue was

i am much better these days - between growing up and medication and anger management
In other words you are a spoiled brat.
maybe a bit lol

boys are expected to do well in school and show a certain amount of stoicism - and any athletic achievement is a big bonus

girls can get away with just being nice - which i could manage between my fits of temperament

Anyone that gives into your tantrums now need to be corrected for your own growth. These are not your friends.
Enough said?
the fits of crying that i had without my meds were not directed to getting anything - i suppose it is possible that they got me affection and attenton that i would not get otherwise - but i dont think they were directed at gaining anything in particular

but i am much better now, seriously - sometimes i think my whole family deserves a sainthood for putting up with me from about 13 to 16 or so

and my bff - to whom i am married now - definitely deserves a sainthood. she stayed my best friend through all of this - always willing to tell me when i was being a stupid brat
That is where your problem started, as an infant or as you were growing up you did not get the proper attention you craved.
As far as the family deserving sainthood, after all they created the problem. They didn't know how to fix the problem so they sent you to someone else. It was not your brothers place, it was the parents place.
If they put up with you that was enablement that spoils. They did it to not take the responsibility. You needed your dad and he failed you. Instead of taking the identity of a loving father, you were imprinted with the identity of your little brother who took that responsibility. That was not fair.
One thing I know is we all get what we deserve in life one way or another. There is perfect justice we pay for our failure to do what I right. Your fits were not your fault, but the failings of parents.

I know because I had my price to pay, but that price caused me to turn to God and for that I am so grateful.

uwot
Posts: 3251
Joined: Mon Jul 23, 2012 7:21 am

Re: another psychiatric diagnosis under my belt

Post by uwot » Fri May 30, 2014 7:35 pm

madera wrote:
uwot wrote:
madera wrote:PS
Baptist republicans? God has blessed them.
he's not overly generous with his blessings, don't you think?
I responded, but, it is not showing.
I said He is very generous with truth but many don't hear it.
Thank you for your persistence. I have no wish to challenge your faith, it's yours and you are welcome to it, and whatever pains you had to endure that brought you to your views, I hope they are over and I am pleased for you that your beliefs have helped you. But it's not many, it's most. If god has blessed baptist republicans, what is to become of the vast majority of humankind who don't fit that profile? Why does your god bless so few?

User avatar
Kayla
Posts: 1108
Joined: Wed Feb 02, 2011 6:31 am

Re: another psychiatric diagnosis under my belt

Post by Kayla » Sat May 31, 2014 4:45 am

madera wrote: That is where your problem started, as an infant or as you were growing up you did not get the proper attention you craved.
As far as the family deserving sainthood, after all they created the problem. They didn't know how to fix the problem so they sent you to someone else. It was not your brothers place, it was the parents place.
a lot of families are a lot less sane than mine and have no one having the sort of epic meltdowns that i used to have

i think a large part of that is just me

yes now that I think about it the approach 'hmmmm..... she does not throw a fit if there is a young child around... even stops having one if one shows up.... lets have a little kid hang out with her to control her temper" is not a good general purpose solution - but in that particular case it worked

madera23
Posts: 27
Joined: Mon May 26, 2014 2:28 pm

Re: another psychiatric diagnosis under my belt

Post by madera23 » Sat May 31, 2014 6:33 am

Hi kayla,
I hope all works out for you. I always see something that is sticky in some situations, sorry about that, I dont let a stone unturned.
I believe you may be too close to your brother.
One day, you will see it for yourself. (I dont like to be too emotionally attached), it is not heallhy.
One thing at a time.
take care.
louise

madera
Posts: 72
Joined: Thu May 22, 2014 11:45 pm

Re: another psychiatric diagnosis under my belt

Post by madera » Sat May 31, 2014 6:44 pm

Kayla wrote:
madera wrote: That is where your problem started, as an infant or as you were growing up you did not get the proper attention you craved.
As far as the family deserving sainthood, after all they created the problem. They didn't know how to fix the problem so they sent you to someone else. It was not your brothers place, it was the parents place.
a lot of families are a lot less sane than mine and have no one having the sort of epic meltdowns that i used to have

i think a large part of that is just me

yes now that I think about it the approach 'hmmmm..... she does not throw a fit if there is a young child around... even stops having one if one shows up.... lets have a little kid hang out with her to control her temper" is not a good general purpose solution - but in that particular case it worked
Maybe it worked and maybe it didn't. Time will tell.

User avatar
Kayla
Posts: 1108
Joined: Wed Feb 02, 2011 6:31 am

Re: another psychiatric diagnosis under my belt

Post by Kayla » Mon Jun 02, 2014 5:39 pm

madera23 wrote:Hi kayla,
I hope all works out for you. I always see something that is sticky in some situations, sorry about that, I dont let a stone unturned.
I believe you may be too close to your brother.
One day, you will see it for yourself. (I dont like to be too emotionally attached), it is not heallhy.
One thing at a time.
take care.
louise
growing up i had quite a few people - including mental health professionals - tell me and my twin brother that we are too close

we ended up lying to a shrink and telling her that we no longer felt any anxiety when away from each other (we still hate being away from each other)

there are still people who think we are too close - who think it would have been much better for us to go to different schools after high school and only see each other for christmas and thanksgiving - fuck that shit, i saw and my bro concurs

instead we are co owners of a business and will be staying together - and we are fortunate that our significant others have no issue with our relationship (it seems if a brother and a sister are too close some filthy minded people start thinking filthy things - thanks a lot Game of Thrones!)

madera
Posts: 72
Joined: Thu May 22, 2014 11:45 pm

Re: another psychiatric diagnosis under my belt

Post by madera » Mon Jun 02, 2014 7:02 pm

Kayla wrote:
madera23 wrote:Hi kayla,
I hope all works out for you. I always see something that is sticky in some situations, sorry about that, I dont let a stone unturned.
I believe you may be too close to your brother.
One day, you will see it for yourself. (I dont like to be too emotionally attached), it is not heallhy.
One thing at a time.
take care.
louise
growing up i had quite a few people - including mental health professionals - tell me and my twin brother that we are too close

we ended up lying to a shrink and telling her that we no longer felt any anxiety when away from each other (we still hate being away from each other)

there are still people who think we are too close - who think it would have been much better for us to go to different schools after high school and only see each other for christmas and thanksgiving - fuck that shit, i saw and my bro concurs

instead we are co owners of a business and will be staying together - and we are fortunate that our significant others have no issue with our relationship (it seems if a brother and a sister are too close some filthy minded people start thinking filthy things - thanks a lot Game of Thrones!)
I am not thinking filthy things concerning you and your brother.
If something happened to your brother, being so close, could either of you survive?
I think not, especially with your emotions.
Think!

Post Reply

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest