Why is it ok to discriminate when you get married?

How should society be organised, if at all?

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duszek
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Joined: Wed Jun 03, 2009 5:27 pm
Location: Thin Air

Re: Why is it ok to discriminate when you get married?

Post by duszek »

Getting married is too personal, yes.

But how about a child´s birthday party ?
Should it be o.k. to invite school friends of one´s own race only and exclude the other ones ?

People discriminate according to the social status of the parents anyway, I suppose.
Skip
Posts: 2820
Joined: Tue Aug 09, 2011 1:34 pm

Re: Why is it ok to discriminate when you get married?

Post by Skip »

duszek wrote: Mon Jun 26, 2017 6:42 pm Getting married is too personal, yes.

But how about a child´s birthday party ?
Should it be o.k. to invite school friends of one´s own race only and exclude the other ones ?

People discriminate according to the social status of the parents anyway, I suppose.
Private party, personal preference. Nobody has the right to even ask why you choose to invite whomever you choose to invite to your home.
After age ten, we used to take our kids out to to the restaurant of their choice on their birthdays. They were allowed to invite up to four friends - and not allowed to disinvite their sibling. As hosts, we had the prerogative of setting the rules.
Now, we could not have stipulated, when making the reservation, that no people we don't like, for whatever reason, be allowed in the restaurant. But if we rented a room in that restaurant, we could admit only people who had valid invitations. If we rented the whole restaurant for a private party that evening, we could also choose our guest list, on any criteria, just as they do at wedding receptions.
But if it's commercial premises, open to the public, then it must be open to all of the public. Even then, restaurants get to set a dress code, or no-shoes rule - so long as it applies to all guests, regardless of race and gender.
Walker
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Joined: Thu Nov 05, 2015 12:00 am

Re: Why is it ok to discriminate when you get married?

Post by Walker »

duszek wrote: Sun Jun 25, 2017 11:04 am Point taken, Walker.

So if we put love aside and focus on interests, can one imagine a person saying:

I cannot marry this person who will make me successful and flourishing because I prefer a bum from my own race.

???
Sounds like the broader question is why get married.
- Plenty of people marry for security, probably more women than men.

If it's your plan to love and be loved no matter the cost of what you may have lost, sharing an entire lifetime with another has upsides and downsides.
- Upside of marrying for love: intimacy of mind, and trust.
- Difference in race only adds to the particulars of the hills and valleys.
- Steepness depends on where you live.
- “All’s fair in love and war,” isn’t just randomly true.

In planning a life of security also consider that you're not rehearsing.
duszek
Posts: 2356
Joined: Wed Jun 03, 2009 5:27 pm
Location: Thin Air

Re: Why is it ok to discriminate when you get married?

Post by duszek »

Not rehearsing ?

But I can back off if I realize a serious danger.
Walker
Posts: 14280
Joined: Thu Nov 05, 2015 12:00 am

Re: Why is it ok to discriminate when you get married?

Post by Walker »

Love is all the way, just like the songs say.
You bend to love, it doesn't bend to you.
Backing out is rehearsal, unlike life.
If backing out is a possible strategy, then best to angle for money and security.
That means if you’ve got money, get a prenup.
If you want to get the money and security, distract from the prenup topic. Like Mrs. Tiger Woods must have done, seeing as how she parlayed a babysitting career into a pot of gold.
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